PIF Traveling Hippy Circus Blog

The plague has ended

2006-04-05T09:06:00.000-04:00

March was a tough month for this travelling hippy circus. The plague hit. Yeah, yeah, some people claim it's the "flu" but we know better. At one point or another, every PIF member was on his death bed, coughing up chunks of lung and gasping for breath. We even had to postpone two shows at the end of the month.

But the good news is that someone invented antibiotics and all the members of the circus are about fully recovered now.

Joe is playing lacrosse and Josh is spending his afternoons on the baseball diamond. Kienan is filling out college scholarship forms, working on lead lines and getting anxious to play some shows. James? Rumor has it that he has been seen on the scene playing sweet bass lines with a screaming band somewhere. "Whroar, grrrrr, eeeeeee, ohhhhhhhh!" (yell that at the top of your lungs with a raspy voice and you'll get the idea.)

Between baseball and lacrosse, you piffers don't have too many show opportunities. We apologize ... but hey, we gotta live high school while we're here, right? things will crank up some in the summer.

Before you know it summer will be gone and Kienan and Josh will head off to college, James will be screaming on a tour of Japan and Joe will be hanging out with his cat considering a solo drum tour.

Maybe we'll get together and play some shows now and then. Who knows? The travelling hippy circus will see how things go and jam when the jamming opportunities come.

April 22 - Saco - United Baptist Church - 7 PM
April 23 - Augusta - Penny Memorial Church - 3 PM

Peace

It's soooo cold

2006-02-27T16:01:00.000-05:00

We've been trying to figure out whose house is the coldest because it's been sooo cold here. So we went to Joe's. He said, "Watch this!" and poured a cup of water into the air. Well, the water froze in mid-air and fell onto the floor.

"Not bad" we said but we still thought each of our houses were colder.

So then we went to Kienan's house. His three-legged weiner dog, Solo, peed and it froze into a yellow ice stream.

"Wow! That's cold," we agreed.

Then we went to Josh's house and he said "Watch this!" and took a big breath and exhaled, whereupon his breath froze into a big lump and fell to the floor.

"Big deal!" said James, "My place is way colder."

Sooo, we went to James' house. He said "Watch this!" and went into the bedroom, threw back the thick covers, and retrieved one of several small balls of ice there. He took it, put it in a spoon, and held a match under it. When it heated up enough, it went "FFFAAAARRRRTTT".

James won. That's pretty cold.

It's been a long time

2006-02-13T17:41:00.000-05:00

We have not blogged. We've been busy exploring the artic regions in search of Emperor penguins and those really cool Chinstrap penguins. They call them chinstrap penguins because they have little things on their necks that look like chinstraps.

It has been a long and icey winter. James used his bare hands to kill a raccoon to make himself a stylish hood to cover his doo rag. Don't worry animal lovers. The raccoon was rabid. It bit Joe. Now Joe foams at the mouth.

Josh is now officially a Bates College incoming freshman. Kienan is still weighing his many college offers. James is studying hard at Saint Joe's and Joe has been busy in his neighborhood. Joe has a beard. Did you know that?

We played a winter retreat this past weekend and went to Bar Harbor last weekend to play for Chelsea's birthday party. Bar Harbor should be called "Far Harbor" because it's so far away you need passports or something.

Next weekend we're playing a show with She's the Car. James is hoping for Escalades, Josh like Lexus, Swiff likes cars with strong windows and Joe prefers trucks. Human Flight Committee and Bobby Bishop are playing too. It's in Laconia. you should come.

Forgive us for not blogging. Penguin hunting is perilous and has taken up all our time.

Nice hat

Meanderings from the road

2006-02-04T19:46:00.000-05:00

The big question is, is it "diven" or "dove?" As in "No, I have never sky diven before."

Chelsea's birthday party was a bash times 10. We drove, drove, drove and then we drove some more. And then, just when we thought we were there, we drove more. Finally, after 3 hours and 40 minutes of driving in the rain and fog (visibility 7 feet), we arrived at the surprise party location. There was much rejoycing! (Woot! Woot!)

We ate cake. We set up a mini sound system. We rocked. 9:00 pm arrived and we saw no blue lights so we played another. Still no blue lights but the fun had to end.

We talked, we snapped pictures, we packed up, we drove into the night and ventured to a brand new Denny's. It was in Ellsworth. It was big. It was nice. We ate. We drove, drove, drove and got home at 3 AM.

Chelsea is 16 and it was sweet. Those Bar Harbor kids can rock!

Yuletide greetings, New Years Shows and a 6 pound burrito

2006-01-04T21:23:00.000-05:00

Well, its been a long time.. We hope you had a merry christmas. We did. Joe got a toy car! James got a BB Gun! Josh got a job! I got a nice shirt! G-g-g-golly! Christmas vacation was nice. Joe and I bugged Josh and James at their respective fast food places of employment. James tried to go to Columbia to visit his friends but he has neither a passport nor money. Josh.. was handsome. Personally, I got to spend some quality time with family, friends, other important people (watching lots of Family Ties), and reading Crime and Punishment. We played a fun show on New Year's Eve in Belfast with Acoustic Artist Nick Adams and played the most cover songs we've ever played since Josh started writing the Ransomed Rock songs. What a blast. Later in the weekend, Joe got yelled at for prank calling Texas.

But I know what you are all waiting to hear about is that 6 pound burrito I mentioned up there. Please, imagine this situation with me. Our favorite velour-clad bass player walks into a mexican restaurant. He is seated with his buddy, Ben, removes his glasses, turns off his cell phone, and begins to peruse the menu. Astonished, he sees the meal of his dreams... the 6 Pound Burrito. A thought runs through his mind (and leaves very quickly) "Well.. I was sick all weekend, but on the other hand, if I eat this I probably wont have to eat for 6 days or so!" He quickly yells, "Garson!" and attempts to order in spanish. After ordering both an "atlantic caboose" and "Bono" he orders in english. "Um, a 6 pound burrito, por favor." The entire resturaunt becomes silent. Diners stand on tables, chairs, and waiters to see the brave young matador who has dared to challenge the legendary burrito. Three women faint. The stunned waiter points out the 6 pound burrito hall of fame. Two aged photographs hang in a shrine to all things buritto. Our friend is determined to join these hallowed ranks of champion burrito eaters. Moments later, the monster is brought on a silver platter. Allow me to relate to you what my nutritionist consultants tell me what must have been included in this burrito. 1 pound of meat. 1 pound of beans. 1 pound of rice. 1-2 pounds of vegetables. 1 pound of sour cream. And everything else. Who knows how big this thing was.

Needless to say, James ate the whole dang thing. He is now the 3rd burrito champion. A living legend. A hero. A modern day Hercules. But you get the point, and as a wise man once said, "Words cannot cook rice." So instead of reading any more of this, write James a congratulation comment. It would make his week.

-Swiff

NP: Death Cab For Cutie - Brothers on a Hotel Bed

Baby, it's cold outside...

2005-12-09T17:36:00.000-05:00

Anyone snowed in yet? I'm getting close. My car looks more like a mini van or an SUV than a Station Wagon right now. Or rather, a mini van or an SUV in side a mound of snow.

In other news, on this date, 41 years ago, a man named John Coltrane recorded one of my favorite albums ever, A Love Supreme. Break out the cake.

I apologise for my lack of relevant information and brevity, but I'm going to see The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe momentarily. Have a nice weekend, folks.

-Swiff

NP: Sleeping at Last - Partial and Incomplete

High flyers ought to use nets.

2005-12-07T16:39:00.000-05:00

Hey Killer(s),

I apologise for my not-so-abnormal extended leave of abscence, my computer crashed on me one night and its now fully back in working condition, reuniting my poor soul to the world of blogs at long last. Not that I'm making excuses or anything.

We had a fun weekend playing all sorts of fun shows and hanging out with all kinds of cool people and bands (made up of people). We liked Boombazi and Paranoid Social Club. We were digging their style. Piffy told you all about it below. I'd tell you about it but I'm embarassed I won't live up to his reporting. Essentially, the weekend can be summed up in one sentence... "Abraham Lincoln once said, 'If you are a racist, I will attack you with the North.'"

So, since I can't tell you about that, here's a little bit of the week of pif. Or rather, a mere 1/4 of the collective week of pif.

Today I recorded in the bathroom. The acoustics were astounding.

The latest listening... Bright Eyes - I'm Wide Awake, It's Morning. I'm digging it.

The latest reading... C.S. Lewis - The Four Loves. I'm digging this too.

And there you have it. A young man with very little important to do and a cheap camera. We hope you're having a great holiday season so far. We are. Merry Christmas, Mr. Potter!

-Swiff

NP: The Choir - Nobody Gets a Smooth Ride

Another thrilling episode of PIF blogginess

2005-12-06T15:06:00.000-05:00

Josh loves Christmas. I mean he really LOVES Christmas. He loves the lights, the music, the decorations. He decorated his tree last night...

He gave it arms, glasses, a tie ... even a pet dog on a leash. Josh is weird.

We PIFfers had a busy weekend. Saturday morning we played a show at a jail for juveniles. It went well and no one walked out on us. We're thinking of having guards and locked doors at all our gigs.

Saturday afternoon we layed around Josh's house watching The Office and laughing at James twitching on the floor while he sleep. James is a sleep twitcher with a bad case of the "jimmy legs." Jimmy legs is a medical phenomenon that makes your legs jump while you are falling asleep. Any "jimmy legs" sufferers out there reading this?

Betty was up visiting from Massachusetts. We all found that, apart from her hatred of Santa, she's a swell gal. Well, she doesn't HATE Santa, she says, but she just subtracts points when she sees him. It's a long complicated story. Betty knows how to roll sound cables and can carry things to the trailer. That makes her a winner in our book. But what does that make James? Hmmm...

Betty is also adept at Gamecube. We think she gained special powers when Josh dropped her on her head in that mosh pit. Maybe next time we will get her playing desert storm and we will all join in lobbing grenades at Joe. He likes that.

Saturday night we headed to the Bath Skate Park to play a show with Boombazi and Paranoid Social Club. It was a good time once things got rolling and we were pumped to see the 20-25 of you who came out specifically to hear us. The promoter wished you had all bought your tickets in advance because that's somehow better than buying them at the door. We'll have to remember that. We'll have James write it in his daytimer, "Note: 25 advance tickets bring in $250 to promoter whereas 25 tickets at the door only brings in $250."

Molly and Emily were there too. What could be better than seeing Molly and Emily and playing in the back room of a skate park? Nothing could be better, I tell you, nothing!

We tried to get James to buy some stylish new Boombazi underwear but he wouldn't do it. He bought a PSC shirt instead.

So ... that's the story of the weekend. Remember to tip your waiters and waitresses on your way out.

The End

Ya know what hurts our feelings?

2005-11-30T16:03:00.000-05:00

When people say we are not photogenic, that really hurts.

I mean, where do they get off saying such harsh things?

We work hard at being in fashion (note collar)

And "striking a pose" comes naturally.

We wear fashionable eyewear.

Even our merch girl Sarah is always stunning.

Not photogenic? Us? Preposterous, I tell you, totally preposterous!

Hey sK8teR kids (noTe the CoOl raNdoM use oF CaPs anD 8) - and non-Sk8Ter kids too - come to the Bath Skate Park Saturday night to see us with Paranoid Social Club, Boombazi, Cambiata and Fate. We'll be on at around 8-8:30 ish we think.

The season for thanks

2005-11-23T16:19:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow Americans will sit down to feast on turkey and yams. While I've never been much of a fan of those orange potato-ish yams, I am a fan of giving thanks. Let's see, stuff we're thankful for ... some serious, some bizzarre ...

1) Family. We have great families.
2) All the people who keep investing in us. Thanks to mom and dad Tounge for making the new CD a reality
3) Deoderant in the glove compartment of the suburban for James
4) Denny's at 3 AM
5) Girls who take their identity from the Creator rather than from guys, media or fashion
6) Youth leaders - ours and yours
7) Sweet pickles
8) China Lake's green room
9) Nick Adams and Jaban for riding along with us
10) Sarah Krabbe (she's also one of those girls mentioned in #5)
11) People on AIM who are rational human beings and fun to talk to
12) Gibson, PRS, Mesa Boogie, Yamaha, Line 6 ...
13) Kind strangers who tell us we are driving with the trailer door up
14) Roger, Chris, Dan and Dave and the people at Soulfest
15) Prime Time Student Ministries
16) Klarity Music
17) The Peterson girls ... who we dig a lot (yes, see #5)
18) Our Gordon College friends
19) The Dello (another #5)
20) Megan's cool pictures that she draws for us
21) Power House
22) Promoters, concert booking folks
23) indieheaven.com
24) Podcast casters who have added us to they podcasts
25) College radio jocks playing our stuff
26) Joe's drum hardware bags
27) People who feed us
28) Dreamers
29) God's being a healer for Kyle and Shara and friends who have had surgery this year
30) Jake's sense of humor
31) Steph, Cindy and the Horr clan
32) Sharpies
33) The message board crew
34) The kids at Cape raising $8000 for Katrina victims
35) People who smile
36) Aqua Teen Hunger Force
37) Myspace friends - approaching 900 now
38) Tropical fog scenting liquid
39) Oreos
40) Dobbie, Eva and Sammy
41) Pamek Pro Sound of Falmouth
42) Day old bagels from Dunkin Donuts
43) Pretzel rods
44) Wendy's late night drive thru with mixers
45) Video games that blow Joe up
46) Three types of shepherd's pie???
47) That one outdoor show when it didn't rain
48) Extreme radio
49) Surprises in life (i.e. people who we drop on their heads in mosh pits) (see #5 again)
50) Salvation

So there ya have it ... 50 things we're thankful for. Maybe, on another day, we will write about 50 things that bum us out. We'll call it Emo Blog or something ... it would probably look something like this

people who can't find any value in more than a couple styles of music / conversations that start with 'do you have a gf?" / swallowing ice cubes by mistake / nonconformists who look like every other nonconformist ... nah, that seems like too much of a bummer. We probably won't do that.

That's the end of this blog.

What are you thankful for?

Male bonding

2005-11-13T21:12:00.000-05:00

Kienan and Josh ventured into the woods of New Hampshire this past weekend, with a couple dozen fine young men, to lead worship at a retreat where men did men things and discussed men things and were ... well, manly.

Today's blog edition is a glance into their experience...

Find Kienan. Hint: he looks sort of monk-like

Josh learns new techniques for effective moshpit/pushpit behavior. Word on the street is that his moshpit techniques are already pretty effective.

After 10 minutes of trying to convince the guys that he was not worthy of any special treatment, Kienan finally gave in and let the guys carry him from place to place.

At one point they strapped him up with some strange sort of device

It left him puzzled as to what was in store...

A few minutes later Josh and Kienan both learned what these guys really meant when they invited them to "hang out" for the weekend.

It was a bit of a surprise...

After dangling from ropes and climbing stuff in manly fashion they retreated to a retreat center and got ready to provide the music for the evening. They're kinda like Ewoks. They were musical tree climbers too.

With the second day came the obligatory manly activity of football. The guys finally let Kienan's feet hit the ground. He rushed for 300 yards and 6 touchdowns while Josh stood on the sideline with brightly colored pom poms.

Josh is a swell guy and everything but we all know that he is not half the athlete of the mighty Swiff ... not that cheering is not athletic or not a sport ... um, we better close this off before things get out of hand ...

It was a grand weekend, a good chance to play music and a blast bonding with guys who are all serious about living by faith.

Turd Ferguson vs Swiff

2005-11-07T19:37:00.000-05:00

It was a mighty showdown in gameshow fashion with an Alex Trubec look alike guy. While Josh was somewhere south grooving to the sounds of our pal David Crowder with the fair Betty and James was out somewhere doing James things, Turd (aka Joe) and Swiff matched wits in Twisted Trivia with the lovely Kayte D.

There was much buzzer battling going on between Turd and Swiff as they jockeyed for the right to answer questions. They jumped out to a quick lead over Kayte.

But then there were physical challenges too. In one the three contestants had to display their dancing skazills in mad fashion doing the chicken dance. Swiff did "the swiff dance" which some PIF fans are very familiar with. Joe just wiggled his thumbs in his armpits and Kayte went downright chickenly wild. But, alas, fair game show fans ... it is not the person who shakes the fiercest booty who wins in gameshow world, it is the person who slaps the button fastest. Much to the disappointment of booing audience members, Swiff won that round.

At one point the PIF boys had to drive a remote control car over a ramp and into a square area to push balls through a goal. Again, the lovely Kate won as Turd and Swiff couldn't get the car over the ramp. Turd crashed into a restaurant and Swiff broke his windows.

As you can tell from the score panels things didn't work out well for our beloved PIF boys at the end of the show. Kayte crushed them.

Turd and Swiff left the show as they had come ... penniless and prizeless. Josh and Betty danced the night away until Josh arrived home in the wee hours of the morning. And James? Um, does anyone know if James is alive?

Save us from ourselves ... book a show!

Happy Halloween from PiF

2005-11-03T14:40:00.000-05:00

Were only a few days late. We hope you had a nice day, or rather, night. The day of Halloween isn't really that important. So tell us what you did on that fine ghoulish evening. I know i watched Seinfeld and ate the candy that no one came to my door to recieve. Lame. I don't think any members of PIF dressed up. Joe may have. He might have been this:

Or this:

Since I'm not really positive about what those costumes are... We'll leave that up to speculation.

In other news, there's a bunch of new websites featuring us... for instance, IndieHeaven. Or, if way cool websites aren't really for you... perhaps an interview?

Have a nice day.

-Swiff

NP: The Decemberists - 16 Military Wives

A Desperate Plea

2005-10-30T11:44:00.000-05:00

Hello cyber-friends, electro-pals and net-buddies.

I suppose you could say it's been a fun weekend in the land of PIF. Josh had thanksgiving a month early, and the rest of us fellows lounged about at Joe's and had the times of our lives. Listened to some screamo, some 70's folk music, played some music on Joe's old piano, listened to James' tales of the bounty-business-hunter-man, watched the texas chain saw massacre (i give it no thumbs up). If that's not the rock-star's life i dont know what is. Joe wanted some girls about, but you see, since the handsome lead singer was not about, that obviously wasn't happening.

You should book PIF. We're getting kind of bored these days and its all your fault. You see, without you, the rock and roll consumer, doing a lot of consuming we sit around at Joe's house all day doing absolutely nothing. Josh runs of to Massachussets and drops kids on their heads or something. Joe starts gnawing on his limbs. James tries to drive to Lousiana. Josh has thanksgiving a month early?

I get lonely and resort to coffeehouse gigs.

James' stories become more and more ridiculous.

We watch texas chain saw massacre, for heaven's sake.

So please, do us a favor and book a show. Save us from ourselves.

-Swiff

NP: Lovedrug - Pretend You're Alive

Falling Back ... or is it Falling Behind

2005-10-29T11:57:00.000-04:00

Tonight's the night. Yes, it's the night that boys and girls all over American wait for with great anticipation. Tonight we all set our clocks back. We take time in our hands and change it.

What if we all just agreed to do "yearlight savings time" and all agreed to turn the clocks and calendars back a year? Or "decadelight savings time" where we all just turn things back a decade (that's 10 years)? That would be something to write home about for sure. Swiff would be 7, Josh 8 and Joe would be 6. James would be 10 and only 275 pounds and 6'1". James' sister would be .... oh bother, I can't do the math.

Joe's football team won again last night. Yay BOBO!!! We're betting they are gonna win the universe championship bowl this year. We watch Joe's cousin on TV ... he's the quarterback of the Boston College team. That makes us almost famous too. James knows a famous guy.

Rumor has it that Josh dropped a blonde girl, I think her name is Betty, on her head while she was crowd surfing at Relient K this week. That's the oldest trick in the book ... he drops them on their head and then while they are stunned he asks to hold their hand. They still say no because he's the lamest and they won't hold his hand. Now he's trying to score ticket to go see David Crowder next Sunday.

In music business news ... the Bull Moose Music chain is selling our CD for a paltry $5.97. Itunes will soon be carrying our stuff. We're this close (put index finger about an inch apart from thumb) to inking a deal to play at the Maine Catholic youth convention at the Holiday Inn. (tell them you want us if you know anyone!) And we just got news that there will be another Maine Christian Teen Convention May 19 & 20. We'd love to play there again and you should go. But, you gotta tell them you want us to play. Go to http://www.mainechristianteen.com/WeekendInformation/Bands/tabid/67/Default.aspx and request PIF and whatever other band you wanna see there too.

Go buy the CD. Please. We have bills to pay ... BIG BIG BILLS.

Why do so many people post hot bikini shots on Myspace?

If you are on Myspace it would be way cool if you took a minute to add PIF and listened to some of our music

http://www.myspace.com/pif

Perhaps the most senseless blog entry yet.

2005-10-27T17:32:00.000-04:00

Last night Josh went to see a House of Heroes concert. I'm pretty jealous. The general consensus is jealousy all around. Oh, some other band was playing too... Relient K or something... no big deal. I just would have liked to see House of Heroes though.. We saw them twice this summer. Very, very talented fellows. Their new CD is in frequent road trip rotation.

So the new CD is out. I think it hit Gold already... maybe platinum. You can try to hear some of the songs on the radio... and there's a show with Paranoid Social Club coming up... Joe's really excited. we're practically famous now. Paranoid Social Club today, U2 tomorow.

In other news, bigfoot exists! I heard it on the radio. I want James to trap one of them and collect the bounty. Just kidding. James doesn't believe in Bigfoot. Just the Loch Ness Monster. And an island full of dinosaurs. Maybe I'll try to catch one. I've done some research...

The distinction is clear: Red = an imposter, Black = the real bigfoot McCoy.

If you find a real McCoy bigfoot, I'll send you a free PIF CD. I promise. And you'll probably get on Oprah or something.

-Swiff

NP: Spoon - I Turn My Camera On

Sun, shine down on my face today

2005-10-25T15:05:00.000-04:00

It's rained 4.3 bazillion stinking inches this year. Every time we played outside, except for Soulfest, it rained. Every time we played inside it rained too. Okay, maybe it didn't rain inside. That was probably just mad drummer sweat but it was still moist.

How much does it rain in Venezuela? 100.5 FM in Venezuela is playing our music. If it doesn't rain so much there maybe we should take a road trip. Or we could fly. That would be something else ... a Uhaul behind a jet. It might look something like this. If we left the trailer door open like we did that time we were heading to Skowhegan ... eeks...

Maybe Josh should sing in Spanish. PóngaLo. OlvídeseLo. Cocine su alimento. Agradable y bueno. What does that even say? I dunno.

Concert offers are coming in fast and furious. Soon the calendar will fill up with PIF dates and this travelling hippy circus will be racking up the miles again. Once Joe is done with football, look out! PIF will be on the loose again.

Well boys and girls and Joe's mom ... it is time to draw this blog to a close and turn on the sump pump. I think I just saw someone float by outside.

Our very first podcast thingy

2005-10-23T16:24:00.000-04:00

Being the trendy band that we are ... always hip to the newest gadget, gizmo and electronic means for communication ... we are heading into the land of pods. If you are a sci-fi fan, and who could blame you if you are, you might feel an icy tingle go down your spine at the mere mention of pods. Every good sci-fi officianado knows fullwell that pods are normally bad news bearing the alien invasion in pupal form. The dry cracking of the pod shell is normally followed by a probing, gooey, spiderish appendage poking around while the heroin screams in horror.

But this podcast thing is quite different. Evidently there are dedicated music fans all over the world putting little radio-like shows together and recording them in MP3 format to be shared (or cast) to people with I-pods. (Pod + cast = Podcast) From what we understand there are very few gooey alien creatures involved at all.

http://pewpod.blogspot.com is the location of our new friend Warren's Podcast. He is putting "Tolerate This" in an upcoming cast. And that has us all in quite a tizzy. It's probably the big break that Joe's been waiting for. Or, maybe not. We don't know how many people listen to Warren's podcast but we told him we would tell both of the PIF fans about it.

We've been sniffing around. James is sniffing around for bad guys, Joe is sniffing around for a state championship in football, Swiff and Josh have been sniffing around looking at colleges. Sarah Queen of Merch has been sniffing around for things to do now that her season of pummeling people with a field hockey stick has come to a close. Plus, we're sniffing around for places to play shows, places that will play our music, people who will be street team members and slimjims. We had slimjims in China. Yum.

We'd love to come to your town to play a show. Just let us know when and where and we'll try to pull it all together to bring the pif brand of face-melting, gut-busting rock and roll to your homies.

Pick up the new PIF CD at your local Bull Moose Music Store.

If you don't have Bull Moose Music in your neck of the woods, you can order online at
http://www.paidinfullrocks.com/pifmerch2.htm

We're hoping lots of people go to Bull Moose to buy the CD so that it could maybe get recognized as a top ten seller in the local music section. That would be cool because people might wonder who PIF is.

Well, PIF fan, it is time to go back to watching football where the green team is currently losing to the white team. And while I do that I will search for other podcasters out there who might be willing to play PIF tunes.

Do us a favor and add a link to PIF to your profile, your myspace, your xanga or tattoo it on your forehead. www.pifrocks.com

We gotta get rid of 1000 cds...

Peace out boyscout

2005-10-20T15:03:00.000-04:00

howdy. The world of PIF is moderately boring as of late. College Searches, late night jams, Football games, braveheart, Bounty Hunting, general mayhem. I'm not kidding about the bounty hunting. Check out James' latest quarry. There are new songs in the works. Josh has a whole bunch of music he's compiled during the mixing/mastering/production process. Perhaps some other songwriting as well? There's really not much going on in our lives right now. Being a rock star gets dull at times. Why don't you tell us about yours. Is your new boyfriend totally dreamy? Did you already wear out your new copy of Dreams for a Generation? Does that eye creep you out? Does the drummer creep you out?

Before you do that though, check out MuteMath's new live video. Pif loves MuteMath these days. But who doesn't?

So long. Maybe we'll see you around. Im going to hole myself up with an 8-track.

-swiff

NP: PIF - The Feel Good song

just kidding.

NP: Death Cab for Cutie - Photobooth

packing tape tales and mysteries of marketing

2005-10-18T13:17:00.000-04:00

Piles of CDS litter the house. They are stacked in boxes in the garage, sliding around loosely in the suburban and scattered around Josh's living room in cool little, high-tech, cd shipping boxes with sharpie addresses on them. Let's take a look at one of those addresses, shall we? We shall.

Hmmm

Amanda Lyman of Vernal, Utah (we won't put Amanda's real address here because weirdos might send her things. Or maybe we should and non-weirdos would send her money. We like it when people send us money.) Well, Amanda, your new Dreams for a Generation cd is nearly on its way to you way out there in Utah.

That was fun ... let's look at another ...

Heidi Peterson in Rutland, VT. We know some Peterson girls from here in Maine. They are some of our favorite people on the planet. I'm thinking that Peterson girls everywhere are just generally awesome. We KNOW Heidi is because she's getting the new CD.

Okay, one more ...

Album Underground in Manchester, TN. Underground, eh? Someone under ground wants our cd? Actually, a few cds. What's under ground? Moles, groundhogs, worms, ants, various bugs, snakes, badgers ... a varitable conucopia of insects and animals. Soon they will all be dancing to the new cd. Rodents need rock too.

Then there are about 10 different boxes headed for Bull Moose Music stores all over Maine and New Hampshire. Yes, our moms will be able to go into a Bull Moose store by the end of next week and pick up the new cd. They will like that. Or, maybe, some other people will buy them ... that's kinda the goal.

Packing tape is sticky and it's clear too. It is a true saying.

Matt Dodge, a college DJ on the radio up in Orono, just emailed to say he got his CD. He likes it and says he's gonna play some stuff on his weekly radio show. That makes us happy. We mailed it to WMSJ and WHMX too for fun but they only play stuff that is endorsed by the man, the vampires, the labels, the machine - ya know? Big business. You can call them and ask them to play it but don't hold your breath. HMX might still have it's local hour but I dunno.

WCYY has it too. We're hoping that something makes it onto Spinout. CYY is cool that way in supporting local bands.

So ... that's about all the news from here in the living room at media/marketing central. Order your cd at www.pifrocks.com and one of these little boxes will have your name on it soon.

Rock on rodents, rock on ...

A sojourn to china lake...

2005-10-10T09:19:00.000-04:00

We played at our favorite polluted body of water this weekend. The unforgettable china lake. Piffy was being a wedding guy in florida. Instead, our good friend Nick Adams came and ran sound, lights, and generally hung out with us. Piffy wasnt around to take pictures, so we brought a cheap little camera and thus was this exclusive picture blog china lake edition born.

The suburban and a fine specimen of a toyota corolla. (or perhaps more accurately, The PIF traveling hippy circus caravan.) And David Crowder is the coolest.

The caravan embarks... It was raining really bad.

James was my driving partner, isn't he dashing? Fact: James can sing very, very high if he wants to. Chris Martin was put to shame.

We got there a little late because we got to the highway and realized we forgot the box of brand new CD's. James is wearing my coat because his got wet. Imagine that.

The stage was really, really big.

There was this amazing room backstage with all this food for us and air hockey and a mini basketball hoop. Not to make you jealous or anything.

Beginning to sound check. Nick tried to make Joe's drums sound good. Look at the placement of those mics. I dont know if he suceeded. Joe's drums are difficult sometimes.

Josh is sound checking. He just graduated to eagle scout. The ceremony was a blast.

It's hard to take a picture of yourself these days. I was aiming for my abs but i slipped.

Another sold-out show.

I forgot to play a solo and took this picture. My bad.

Check it out. New CD's. Fact: The eye is James from Rockland's.

They showed up eventually. They're really good people, if you get to know them.

After the show, James changed into his FUBU gear. The ladies loved it.

Isn't this picture artsy?

Joe's collar naturally pops, he tells me. I guess the hipness is just part of his nature.

You can't really read it, but it says "Kick Me". That James is really clever. This stayed on his back for maybe 5 or 10 minutes. Everyone was kicking him. We got a kick out of it.

I cant figure out if he's telling me to be quiet or sticking his finger up his nose. Joe's sister is having a baby soon. He's talking to her in this one. The trailer gets better reception, I guess.

Denny's, the mecca of all PIF roadtrips. We don't always make it, sadly.

Denny's was too busy. We had to go to Wendy's.

You know all the stuff in that room backstage? The junk food elves put it all in my car. Lucky me.

So that's it. We had fun. We hope you did. Don't swim in that lake.

- Swiff

The Postal Service - "District Sleeps Alone Tonight"

An update

2005-10-06T17:06:00.000-04:00

I bet you're wondering where in the world we've been. Well... funny you should ask. here's an in-depth update on the secret lives of PIF. See if you can guess which is real and which is... slightly not real.

Josh - Josh is a busy man taking a calculus class at USM in addition with his being homeschooled. He's back from geek camp and wanted to go to Harvard but doesn't anymore. Now he wants to go to... somewhere else. Josh currently enjoys the new Emery CD, Stevie Nicks, and Michael Jackson's Thriller. At this very moment josh is salivating over a shiny new box of new PIF cd's hot off the presses ready to be sold this weekend. He called me just to tell me about it. i hear theyre pretty. james' thank you section is completely authentic.

James - Speaking of james, currently he is pursuing a plentitude of carreer options, including: Real Estate Agent, Bounty Hunter, Contractor, Animal Care Expert, and probably many more that im forgetting. James has gone through a wardrobe change as of late. check out the pictures on the site for a glimpse of his sweet new suit. The man is the epitomy of hipness. James bought a fancy car, but i forgot the name. Its somethine exotic and hip sounding. He's still working at dunkin donuts serving up fresh cups of happiness to one and to all. Right now he's into some sweet hip hop beats.

Joe - Joe is playing football from time to time. He's got a truck now and he enjoys cruising the town with his collar stylishly popped. What a stud. We all had a grand ould time at his beach house this summer. Soon Joe will be "uncle joey," which is good because every young child should have an uncle joey. i always wished i had one. Right now joe likes the new Emery cd, too, copeland, acceptance, jack johnson and others.

Me - Right now, im composing a magnificient Jazz opus. Or something like that. YOu probably dont want to hear about me. My life can be summed up in very few words: School, jazz, classical, application, eat, phone, sleep. Cryptic, i know. Right now im digging Death Cab for Cutie, Denison Witmer, David Crowder, and Arcade Fire.

We're playing this weekend in China, home of our favourite lake in maine. Look for an exclusive blog update when we get back.

-Swiff

NP: Death Cab For Cutie - We Looked Like Giants

Man, we've been busy

2005-09-29T18:58:00.000-04:00

Busy, busy with stuff ... there were the things with the people ... all the stuff at those places ... and then we had that other stuff to do too.

It's like every day there has been a list of things to do:

-wakeup
-pee
-shower
-brush the teeth
-grab something to eat on the way out ther door
-drive to school
-get schoolin'
-drive home
-eat some stuff
-check the email
-do the homework
-talk to both the pif fans online
-pee
-go to bed

Man ... no wonder we haven't blogged in so long.

This blog would be longer 'cept I gotta go pee. ...

Peace

Rockin' in Skowtown

2005-08-30T17:26:00.000-04:00

The PIF Traveling Hippy Circus packed into the 'burb and headed for Skowhegan Saturday. Piffy, the PIF guys, our pal Nick, merch girl Sarah and little bro Jake made for a full load.

At around 3:30 we turned into Coburn Park and went in search of the Gazebo. Our new friend Chris met us at the gazebo of choice and told us of a little problem ... seems there was no power there. Hmmm ... what to do? what to do?

Thankfully Coburn Park has multiple gazebos and the other one did have a couple outlets. Who woulda thunk it? TWO gazebos in one town park! Those Skowhegan folks sure take park planning seriously. That is evident.

We immediately set about the task of unloading the trailer, setting up the equipment, putting the merchandise out for display in anticipation of the Skowtown mobs that were sure to be out for the merriment.

Nick Adams dazzled the crowd with his groovey acoustic stylings and throaty vocals to open the night while the rest of us dined on two (yes, two) shephard's pie dishes and an assortment of salads.

Next up, that hip-hop phenom J-byn had us all in stitches with his clever rappings. He's a lonely rapper from the rural streets of Maine.

As a hush came over the masses, the PIF crew took the stage to close off the night. (crick, crick, crick) "I can hear crickets." Okay, truth is that there were maybe 20 people there. The Skowtown mobs had other plans.

Let's see ... highlights of the show ...

- a 4 year old blonde girl peering through the gazebo rails at swiff
- a 4 year old blonde girl doing cartwheels and twirls
- a 4 year old blonde girl picking up the power chords and almost unplugging the sound (she didn't but we kinda wish she had)

It was an entertaining night as we and all the fans in their lawn chairs watched blonde girl antics throughout the show.

Then, the good folks who endured the show took up a collection and gathered almost enough money to pay for gas.

Yes ... it was one of those nights when rock bands wonder if it's all worth it. But, Josh brought it all into perspective when he said...

"It always happens like that. Right after we have a show with 4 or 5 hundred people and think 'hey, maybe we're okay' it's always the next show we play that brings us back to the reality of 'no, we still suck'."

Yeah ... we call nights like this one "humbling."

And on most of these types of nights we don't even have a little blonde girl to watch. That's rough...

The next show can only be better. If not, we're gonna hang ourselves with Swiff's shoelaces ...

just kidding

maybe

Eleven days

2005-08-20T19:18:00.000-04:00

Wow. It's been eleven days since we last blogged. That's poopy.

Joe's playing football, James is making donuts, Swiff is harassing tourists and Josh went to camp and had fun. But, fall is coming and shows are lined up. That will call for a resounding HUZZAH!

Josh went into the studio and laid down the final track for the cd. It will be mastered on Thursday and then head off to production. That will call for another resounding HUZZAH.

If you didn't know ... colonial soldiers used to yell "huzzah" when celebrating or charging into battle. There will be a quiz later.

We're going up to Skowhegan next Saturday to rock SKOWTOWN. You show come out to the town gazebo to rock with us at 5 or so.

We're back from soulfest....

2005-08-09T14:54:00.000-04:00

and hopefully you are too.

We had a bundle of fun up in the scenic mountains hanging out with all of our buddies and making new friends. We tented, campered, semi-showered, rolled in the dust, and generally were very dirty all week long. James reached an all new height of odorosity. Just kidding, James found it in himself to wash with the rest of us as we hosed ourselves down in attempts to bathe. Our shows were generally good, we felt. The Inside Out Stage was big and impressive. Joe wanted to play shirtless like all those hottttt rock stars, but we said, "no way, hormone-boy." The Mountaintop stage was nice as well, it was essentially a front porch. excluding some forgotten words and other mishaps, it was OK. laid back. Joe discovered a love for hardcor music whilst visiting the Haste the Day show. Now he and James mosh like there's no tommorow. Watch out for those windmill-kicks.

Speaking of James... He got a fancy new truck. complete with a runny spray-paint job and big portrait of a deer on his front seat. Very, very stylish. Joe also got his liscence last week. We all drove around the town for a while with him the day before Soulfest. No injuries. No broken Resturaunts. Rather unfortunatley, Josh lost his big baseball tournament... but no worries. We still think he's the greatest... he can even crowd surf now with his fancy wireless gear. Oh, the rest of us piffers are dying of jealousy. Especially James, he would have loved to chill out on one of those lawn chairs during the shows.

Back to soulfest... By far, the concensus among all pif members is that MuteMath is the greatest and most ADD ridden band of all time. We've already seen them live twice before the 2 times we were wowed at soulfest 2006... i mean, 5. And we've been digging the Reset EP ever since it came out last fall. But after seeing them this year, we are officially in love with mutemath. How can you get any better with a drummer who knocks stuff over in a bi-songly manner, a bass player who looks like Elton John and whacks on things with a big old mallet, a frontman who flips out and cant sit still for more than a few seconds (and plays the key-tar), and a guitarist who...... just kind of stands there. PIF's favorite band. Check them out... If Joe and I agree on this, it pretty much means their the greatest band ever.

Enough of that. Tell us your soulfest story... its probably more interesting than ours.

-Swiff

NP: Nickel Creek - First and Last Waltz

Dear Mom - it's time for Soulfest

2005-07-29T16:05:00.000-04:00

Well, we're getting ready to head out to that glorious, blistering hot, sometimes thunderous and always jubilant Soulfest music festival with about 15,000 of our closest friends. Don't worry Mom, James has promised that he will be responsible and watch out for us. Afterall Mom, he's 20 ya know...

We all promise to pack enough clean underwear for the whole 5 days because you've taught us that we don't want to be embarrassed if we have to go to the hospital or something in dirty underwear. Frankly Mom, we don't understand that logic very well. We're betting if we got hit by a truck or fell off the chairlift that our undies wouldn't be all that clean anymore. But, out of respect for you and general rules of good hygene, we promise to wear clean whitey tighties every day.

Yes, Mom, we will all drink lots of water and use sunscreen and we'll eat well too. Fried dough is a staple. We promise to sleep well too because we all know how grumpy Bobo gets when he is overtired. We'll go to bed before sun-up every morning, we promise.

Try not to worry Mom. We'll all look out for each other and do our best to keep the ladies off of Josh. Maybe we'll take away his deoderant and his extra whitey tighties if you think that would help. Or maybe we'll have "angry artist" fold his arms and scowl at them ... that could work.

Thanks for reading our blog Mom and for buying our cd too. Reloading the website 70,000 times this year was nice of you too. It makes us feel like someone out there actually likes our music. All those fake names on the message board are a nice touch too Mom, even if we all know it's really you pretending to be someone else.

You rock Mom. We'll see you August 8 ... unless, of course, you drive down to see our show at NOON Friday on the Inside Out Stage or the worship set at 11:00 Sunday on the Mountain Top Stage.

That muster been one of the best shows evah

2005-07-21T13:08:00.000-04:00

Alfred Festival Day was all that was predicted and so much more. Solo the three-legged weiner dog gave the show a 15-toes up rating. Our Alfred skating friends came by but they didn't hang around to talk to us and that made us sad. The must have had pressing engagements to attend to. Either that or they saw how sweaty we were and said, "Woah, those guys have got to be ripe."

We setup in the outfield. At first the guy told us to point everything at the woods so we wouldn't bother anyone except for the squirrels. We took that in stride and said, "Hey, you're the ones paying us to play, we'll setup wherever you want." Then the big kahuna of all things Alfred came and said, "What?? Of course we don't want you facing the woods. No one is over there (except for the aforementioned squirrells). Direct your sound toward the people."

So, we moved some stuff and directed our ear-exploding rock and roll grooves toward the masses. While we were sound-checking a firetruck drove in. We were excited. James wanted to know if they would give him a ride and let him wear a fireman hat. He's into hats. So, these firefighting, endeared civil servants parked their truck maybe 60 yards in front of us, took out all their hoses and commenced to do what firefighters call a "muster." They raced and squirted stuff while we played our show. That was a first for us. Their pumper truck was loud enough to drown out most of our tastey licks once you got away from the stage. Solo was looking for a sweet-looking lady dalmation firedog but there was none to be found. Solo was the saddest three-legged weiner dog in Alfred on that particular day by far.

It was 4 billion degrees and the sun was blazing. Did you know that sunlight makes guitar strings go out of tune quicker? It's true. Look it up. We tuned, retuned and tuned again, drank water and provided a full-hour of stupendous entertainment for the preschoolers on the top of the slide, the skaters next to the cement shed, a couple dozen folks on the bleachers and Sarah, Shara and Sarah. We noted that these three young ladies all shared the same letters in their names yet moving one simple H changed the sound significantly. They were unimpressed.

James and Joe got there 20 minutes early and still showed up a half-hour late for setup. I'm pretty sure they have a sensor that tells them when the trailer is empty.

Ahhhh ... good old Alfred. We shall remember it fondly forever. Maybe they will pay us to come play for the rescue crews next year. That would be sweet. We could get free bandaids for Joe's bloody toe and James could tell them about all his horrific football ailments and explain his allergy to nitrates.

It's rock and roll. You just never know what could happen.

I wish Swiff would write a blog soon. He's been working so hard.

Alfred was Batman's butler

2005-07-15T20:43:00.000-04:00

Biff! Wham! Pow! Nanananananana Batman ... Old school Batman was definitely cool. "Holy thermal underwear, Batman, it's the Penguin again!" trusty sidekick Robin would yell. And then there was Alfred the butler. He was cool because he was in on the whole Bruce Wayne scam. He knew what was up but kept it on the DL. Dear, butlerish Alfred.

We're going to Alfred (the town, not the butler) tomorrow. Yes, this travelling hippy circus of scruffy-faced rabscallions (used that word two blogs in a row)will bring its brand of face-melting rock to the festivities at Alfred festival day at 1:30 at the town park.

We'll be playing at the ballfield where Joshua hit his first homerun at the tender age of 11. The infamous ball is now displayed in the baseball shrine in his room. Alfred has many sweet memories for Josh for it is where he spent his childhood. We'll be playing at the same park where he fell off his trick bike and ripped a deep gash in his leg that required a bunch of stitches. Maybe he'll wax nostalgic and show you the scar if you come. Chicks dig scars.

Alfred will be alive with vendors peddling their goods. You can pick up a new hat made from dog hair or get your name carved into a piece of pine. You can buy some fried dough or some fair sausages with peppers and onions. Gotta love town festivals - especially in a place called Alfred.

I wish I had a butler named Alfred... and a batcave ... and a way-cool batmobile. Life would be so sweet. Man, sliding down the batpole would be so much fun. But, if PIF had a batpole we'd probably never leave the house. It would just be too much fun sliding down it all the time.

So, I guess it's best to leave the caped stuff to the real Batman and his own Alfred while we keep playing rock and heading for the town of Alfred.

Hope to see you at the show.

1:30-2:30 pm - FREE - Alfred Park across from the Alfred Fire Station

witty title goes here

2005-07-12T22:13:00.000-04:00

Once upon a time there was a band of joyous minstrels named PIF on a quest to find the land of rock. They traveled far and wide with the fair maiden Sarah through lands of strange names like "Wiscasset" at a pace of 1 mile per hour while King James told tales far and wider.

After driving alongside every tourist in Vacationland, the Burb and trailer rolled into the land of rock and the band scurried to unload its noise-making equipment to make merriment for the locals.

The elders of the town were nervous for never before had such a troupe of rabscallions invaded their city walls. They watched with wide eyes as the light tree cranked up into position. They winced at the weedily weedily weedily squeals that came forth from the mighty Mesa. And they wondered what this troupe of minstrels might stir up.

The youth of the land of rock came forth and the show began.

And then we ate at Denny's and went home.

The end

2 shows, 2 days, 2 more times for Joe to forget things.

2005-07-05T17:36:00.000-04:00

We're playing twice this weekend. Please, oh please come and see us. It would make us the happiest 4 young men in the Greater Portland area. James might do a cartwheel.

(and if you come, stand on James' side of the stage. He likes that alot.)

Joe and James are currently en route to my abode with some buddies. We're going to the beach or something. As if I'm not sunburned enough.

So come see us, stand as close to James as possible, and ask Joe about his girlfriend Tina.

7.9.05
Rockland, ME
1 Waldo Ave
594-2042
$3.00 at the door
7 pm

7.10.05
Portland, ME
The Station
with Flyleaf, The Chemistry, The Kingpin Wrecking Crew and Alteria.
$10.00 Order tix here
All Ages

-Swiff

NP: Lovedrug - Pretend You're Alive.

Momma had a baby and its head popped off

2005-07-01T09:36:00.000-04:00

PIF has been in labor since November. (imagine sounds of labored breathing - "Whoo whoo whoo - sssssshh - who who who - shhhhhh") Now, that little bugger called ... um, well, it doesn't have a name yet, so now we'll just call him "Diskie" ... is just about to make his way into the world complete with 11 tracks of rockin' PIF groovin' tunes. It looks like he will be a healthy and weighty little fellow offering the people he plays with some surprises and an occasional laugh.

Word on the street is that Joe's mom really likes all the new songs.

Today will be the fourth studio day in a row and will focus on mixing and redoing the vocals on one song. Then, we'll need another day for mixing the rest and a day for mastering. Our engineer, the talented Jim Begley, is heading away for a week of vacation so things are looking pretty sketchy for presenting Disky to the general public on August 1. But, it will be soon for sure.

We'll be working on things like art and titles and linear notes during the coming week. We want to make sure the birth announcements look good. We'll be doing new media kits and all if we can agree on a direction for the artwork and overall concept. Got any ideas?

Disky has some piano parts on him. Josh plays on American Dream and Joe plays on Long Cold Winter. This may leave the general public wondering, "Whoa, are these guys actually musicians in addition to being rock n rollers?" Or, maybe they won't wonder ...

Wednesday was a long day. We were in the studio from 9-5 and then drove to NH to play a show, which was a rockin' good time, and then got home at 3:00 am Thursday to head back for the studio at 9 again. Man, the thrill of the rock n roll life. James was way too ripe by the end of it. He thinks deoderant gives people cancer or something. We think his stench gives us cancer of the nose.

"Um, who can smell James from where you're standing? Uh, yeah ... sorry about that."

Well, both of you PIF fans who read this ... we must draw this blog to a close. I gotta order some lunch to bring to the studio.

Peace,
PIF

The end is near?

2005-06-28T07:21:00.000-04:00

In about 5 minutes I leave for the beginning of what might be our last studio session for the new CD. We're working on "Breaking Barriers," "Sunshine (working title)," "A long, cold winter," and a brand new song Joe has written, which few or none of you have ever had the chance to hear. Perhaps by Wednesday or Thursday there will be rough mixes. Wish us luck, and if you want to bring us lunch every once in a while, that would be OK, too.

-Swiff

NP: Radiohead - Let Down

Who says only the good die young?

2005-06-22T22:23:00.000-04:00

Happy birthday to everyone's favorite big, hairy bass player.

-Swiff

NP: The Perishers - Weekends

Tuesday at the Terrific Tounges'

2005-06-21T21:51:00.000-04:00

So. It's summer. People are frolicking over the sand dunes, sailing in boats maybe, being involved in the ever-so-popular summer romance, isn't it nice? I would tend to think it is.

Today, I woke up late in the morning and left for the mecca of about 50% of my semi-daily pilgrimages of long car drives, the grand oulde city of Portland. I was on my way to a certain Mr. Tounge's residence, but I stopped on the way and picked up two new CD's: Coldplay - X&Y and House of Heroes - House of Heroes. After forking over the dough and getting a headache from looking at Coldplay's album art I went over to Joe's. I got there and he said "hi" and then left. He had a meeting or something. So, I made myself at home, popped in the Coldplay CD and jammed out with it on Joe's old piano. Joe's got a shiny new iPod for his birthday (which was last weekend). He's 16 now. And never been kissed? I doubt it, hes such a lady magnet.

After longer than he said, Joe came back and we walked down the street to get lunch. On the way home we saw our old friend Mindy Meisner who wrote the lyrics to our oldie, "You Came Knocking" (off of Societal Dropouts), we stayed and talked to her for a while. She's going to Williams next year. That's impressive. Then we went home and played some music. Then our friend Abby came over (that angry looking girl from the latest set of studio pic's). We played lacrosse. Or rather, Joe and Abby played lacrosse, and I played a game that one might very loosely call lacrosse if you weren't watching very closely.

I left after dinner, because Joe still has some finals tommorow and he needed to study up to keep his 4.2 GPA. and that's the story for at least Paid in Half. The other half? Who knows. Josh is off at some camp thing in Massachussetts learning to be a sucessful doctor. If he passes out on stage again he'll be able to revive himself, I imagine. James was who knows where doing who knows what, probably being a bouncer. Or building a complete set of furniture from a tree he cut down in his back yard. Or driving real fast over speed bumps. Or seeing how fast he can grow a full beard. Who knows what that man does with his spare time?

I've got a phone call to make, so that's all you get. Have a great summer, don't ever change.

-Swiff

NP: Coldplay - Swallowed in the Sea.

Saving the best for last

2005-06-18T21:25:00.000-04:00

Only 4 studio days left to get the new CD finished. Josh tells me he thinks these last three or 4 songs are going to be the strongest on the disc. I am looking forward to hearing them.

PIF is off to Wells tomorrow morning to hangout and play some music with the good folks at the Wells CC on Main Street. Then Josh heads to Babson College for a week. When he comes back we'll hit the studio with enthusiasm to get this thing wrapped up.

Wednesday June 29 PIF is playing a late night show in Alton, NH. That will be a rocking good time.

10:25

2005-06-13T22:26:00.000-04:00

Hot, humid, sticky ... it's better than cold rain.

We need to take some PIF promo pictures at some point soon. Hmmm ... what shall we do? Swiff suggested a band photo in a field of a thousand flamingos. Where can we find a thousand flamingos?

Maybe we should do something lame ... everybody on a kiddie ride at an amusement park?

Got any cool ideas? What would be a cool picture?

Here's a picture of Josh zoning out at a swim meet..

I wanna watch tv on my phone

2005-06-07T16:35:00.000-04:00

Newsweek says we're gonna have a billion channels soon and that we will all be watching tv on our cell phones. I'm concerned about the terminology. I mean, the family used to gather around to watch "television" because that's what they called the boob tube that had images on it. They actually watched a signal that was broadcast to their television sets. Now, we will be able to watch that signal on our cell phones. But why, do tell, do they still call it watching "television?" Won't we actually be "watching cell?" Life is full of such puzzles.

Swiff has a big guitar-playing-recital-thingy coming up this weekend. Grandmas from all over Southern Maine will pinch his cheek and give him an "attaboy."

Joe is embroiled in the world of LAX playoffs. LAX, for those of you from other parts of the world, is a game where people run around with nets on sticks throwing a ball to one another and then trying to throw the ball past a goalie and into a net. The indians invented it.

James is outta school for the summer and searching for employment. I think he should get an ice cream truck. That would be sweet.

Josh is playing baseball and is in the playoffs as well. We say "Attaboy!" because Josh just learned that he was selected to play third base for the Underclass All Star Team for Western Maine.

We've got one more block of time in the studio to try to wrap up the new CD. We'll be in the studio four days straight at the end of June. Say a prayer ... would ya?

Long time no see.

2005-05-31T20:44:00.000-04:00

Hi again. It's been a while.

Things have been crazy, We've been in and out of the studio doing this and that, Josh has been losing at baseball (just kidding, he only did that once, and probably never will again). Joe has been playing lacrosse and being lonely. James has been... doing James things, enough said. I've been back and forth between work and home and everywhere in between and not inbetween. Gas is expensive.

Below is a near-perfect description of this past weekend's events by our very own Piffy, I would only like to add one thing. Josh Linscott is the luckiest man alive. Let me tell you about it. Picture this: Outside of a church, Josh, Emily and I are casually reclining on a grassy knoll. Other assorted Piffers and a newly loaded trailer are nearby. Casually I mention that I have been looking for a 4-leafed clover (this particular knoll was more of a clovery knoll). Immediately, Joshua picks one out of the ground. Shortly after, I found one of my own. In conclusion, either FBC portland has been dumping radioactive waste into their clover patches or Josh should start playing the Lottery.

Today I saw the new Star Wars movie with my younger brother and sister. I was a fan. Joe will probably be mad I didn't go with him. He doesn't like it when I see other people. He's really up in arms these days.

-Swiff

NP: This Holiday Life - The Others

Why blog on Memorial Day? Why Not?

2005-05-30T11:53:00.000-04:00

I'm blogging at the same time as Sarah the Merch Queen is blogging. It is a bloggy day.

Sunday was a fun day. (Whoa, that ryhmes) First, PIF went to church with a few hundred friends and enjoyed leading the singing. You can watch it on TV next Sunday at 10 or 3 if you have Time Warner in Southern Maine. It's on channel 3.

The we packed nine of us in the burb and headed for Limerick

There was a lame band in a Burb
Their music was nearly superb
While Emily did glance
James oiled his pants
And then changed his name to Herb

That's a limerick ... but we went to a town named Limerick. Perhaps it was where such prose originated.

James actually did oil his pants. ("Oh man, I oiled my pants!") We had a pile of italian sandwiches and one napkin to share. Italians are oily. (not the people, the sandwiches) And, well, James go sandwhich oil on his pants and was in a tizzy.

It was a nice drive. The seating chart:

Front: Piffy, Sarah, Josh (Sarah had to sit on the hump 'cause it was deemed that she had the shortest legs)
Row two: Joe, Jake (Josh's hippy brother), James (or Herb)
Row three: Laura(or en), Emily, Swiff

The storm we drove into sparked a nice discussion about tornados and Josh observed that when you book PIF for an outside gig, "You book rain." That does seem to be the pattern a lot of times. We did play on a truck trailer outside one time somewhere (we forget) with IOTA and EUROCLYDON ("that sounds like a dinosaur" - Swiff)and it was sunny.

So, we pulled into a cool little church in Limerick

There was a cool church that was dandy
They gave us some blue cotton candy
the show was way keen
"I'm Sarah nineteen"
The rain made us go to plan D

Plan A - play outside
Plan B - play inside using their new sound system
Plan C - play the BOSE and have a dance party
Plan D - set up all our junk and play inside

This Limerick blog is getting long ... so I will edit it down to bullet point highlights

- grade 3 and 4 trivia on the trip home
- trailer back on time
- pizza and birthday cake (Josh's mom)
- Abby joins the fun
- Spoons and brawls
- Emily and Lauren head for home in Chelsea
- Swiff heads for Kennebunk
- Titanic ends at 11:08
- Abby drops Sarah off on her way home
- SNORE

So, there ya have it. The Limerick blog ...

Not much going on this weekend, huh?

2005-05-26T09:14:00.000-04:00

Let's see ...

Friday:
6 pm - Joe plays Lacrosse, Josh might have a baseball game
9-11:30 - PIF practice

Saturday:
10:00 am - Get up
12-5 pm - More work on the new cd in the studio
6:30 pm - pick up a trailer
7:00 pm - Load up the trailer

Sunday:
10:00 am - setup and soundcheck
11:00 am - lead the service at FBC Portland
12:30 pm - Head for Limerick
1:30 pm - Setup for the block party (inside? stupid rain))
3:00 pm - Play the show for those rockin' Limerickites
5:00 pm - Load the trailer
6:00 pm - Unload the trailer at FBC
6:30 pm - Return the trailer to U-haul

Other than that ... there's not a whole lot going on this weekend for us? How about you?

New rough mixes

2005-05-24T18:13:00.000-04:00

Stu stu studio

Rough mixes are rolling out and showing up on the Purevolume site now and then. You should check it out. Right now there's "I'm the Lamest" and you can listen to it and proclaim, "Indeed, this is lame." Or maybe you will like it and you'll wake the kids and call the neighbors to get them all to frolic in front of the computer while the song cranks out of those crappy little speakers of yours.

http://www.purevolume.com/pifpaidinfull

We'll be putting up a rough mix of American Dream sometime next week and then the rough of Up In Flames sometime after that.

Gosh, ain't it fun to record a new cd? Heck yes.

We'll be back in the sudio on Saturday working on something else.

A bright yellow glow

2005-05-19T09:08:00.000-04:00

I awoke to something truly puzzling. In place of the normal grayish-blue, dreary sky was a very bright blue. And up there shining so bright that it almost burned a hole in my retinas was a brilliant yellow orb. I am not sure what it is. Is it meant for good? Has it come to destroy us?

I must admit that while it frightened me initially, I am somehow drawn to its warmth. It feels good shining on my skin and it makes me feel all warm inside. Do you think it might stay around?

Is it our friend? Can it be trusted? What is it?

If it weren't for bad luck

2005-05-13T23:37:00.000-04:00

Well, here it is Friday the 13th with less than 30 minutes until the 14th. Friday the 13th ... ooooh .... spooky. Supposed to be bad luck. Did I have bad luck today? My breakfast was yummy, my car started, lunch was yummy, the afternoon was sunny and I mowed the lawn and didn't cut off my hand or anything. I watch Emily-a-lee play tennis and it was sunny. I had pizza. All in all ... it's been a grand day ... not bad luck at all.

Renewed efforts are being made to try to get back into the studio to finish up the cd. Our people are calling their people and stuff.

The Soulfest compilation CD is out and it's better than eating mud for sure. Actually, I'm digging the first disc alot. Lots of great stuff. PIF is on disc one with Roper, Skillet, Kutless, Hawk Nelson and a bunch of other swell folks. We wish we had time to remix the song before the cd deadline because we would have put the chorus up front but alas ... the clock beat us. Still, it's decent. You should get your paws on one.

PIF is taking a break from practicing and recording to play a show Sunday, May 28 at 3:00 in Limerick. You should get your paws over to Limerick and hop up and down to the face-melting guitar riffs.

How many Emily's do we know? Let's see ...
- There's Augusta-area Emily and she's the cat's pajamas
- There's the Dello buddy, Abby-sibling Emily and she likes to do math for fun
- There's the Emily who hates our music even more than searching for marbles in a bowl of razor blades. We still love her though cause she's fun.
- There's the Emily from that one show ... we all remember her
- There's Krabbe's little sister Emily. She's a cutie
- There's Joe's cat Emily
- And then there's Emily the waitress at Denny's

Well, that was fun ... I wonder how many Betty's we know. Perhaps we will list them at another time in another thrilling blog entry.

If you see Swiff, ask him for three scoops ...

The glorious return of Piffy

2005-05-10T16:03:00.000-04:00

Scroll down.

That's right, Piffy is back. Assuming you scrolled back up to read this.

We've been preparing new songs diligently. Three new ones are the works. Working titles: "The Feel Good Song," "Breaking Barriers," and "Sunshine." Those sound summery. Just like today, what was it 70 outside? The songs are almost ready to be played in public.

Last weekend we went with some friends to see "Fever Pitch," a movie about all my favorite things: goofy people, love and sports. Before we went to Wendy's. Joe payed for my dinner because I'm broke and he's not. You should hear him talk on his cell phone. Louder than his mom, and she's loud. The movie was good. The guy behind me was laughing as loud as Joe was talking, but after a while I said something and he stopped. Thank heavens.

There were all sorts of people at the Linscott's house when we got back, a very happening party. One of our friends was there. It was her birthday. She was kind of out of it since she was all drugged up from getting poison sumac.

AP tests have come and gone, so I'm basically done with school. James has finals next week, so then he's done with school too. He's ready for the beach.

- Swiff

NP: The Arcade Fire - Crown of Love

Yankees gettin' spankeed

2005-05-09T19:46:00.000-04:00

We've had more rain this spring than a New York city cabdriver has stink in an August heatwave. Everything is downright moist. Gray days make me blue.

Rain doesn't bother that tough guy LAX player Joe because they play in the foulest of weather but Josh is a baseball player and foul weather messes things up. Swiff is a guitar player ... weather does not bother him at all. Real Estate mogul James can sell houses in a Hurricane.

Summer bookings are rolling in. We're trying to figure out which ones we can take between Josh's baseball schedule, Swiff's summer employment dishing out ice cream to tourists, James' 12-hour days and Joe's lounging at the beach house. Check the shows page often to see what we're up to. The rock will continue. It must continue.

Come check out the show in Limerick on May 29 at 3:00 pm. It will be a good time.

How 'bout them Yankees?

Recent events: the haiku

2005-05-03T20:38:00.000-04:00

Boothbay concert: fun.
James is stylish, nice orange shirt.
Real Estate Mav'rick.

Joshua: many T's
Joe with collar popped, watches as
we set up his drums.

Dave eats whole pizza?
None for band sleeping in rear.
'Nitrates' give James hives.

Saturday morning:
I sleep late, 3 rise early.
Bottles, Baseball and Housing.

Long drives, heavy rain.
Illegal tires and tea.
Joe sends wierd phone texts.

Revenge on Duck-kind
A fowl from China Lake
Septic truck frightens

Cowbell- Dance all night!
Spinning, fav'rite Clapton song
Fitty Cent is fab.

Late night, early morn'
I stood up at the wrong time.
Too early for hymn.

Driving, semi-lost.
Lline of halted cars, I wait.
Long time, they are parked.

Screech to a halt- wow.
slow porcupine crosses road
He took much time, hours?

If you can decipher that, nice job.

- Swiff

NP: Sixpence None the Richer - We Have Forgotten

Here's the scoop

2005-04-28T17:36:00.000-04:00

Perhaps you've noticed the considerable lack of blogging in the realm of PIF as of late. More likely, you haven't. Let me explain. It all started back last week over April break, and King James was hard at work on a "5 page paper," including a title page, and 2 pages of "reference." You do the math. It's tough, I know. Anyways, since his Lordship had holed himself up in front of a computer, typing away day and night, Joe the orphan began to feel lonely. His severe loneliness continued to intensify. Lonely, so lonely. The poor orphan turned to his fellow band members in search of consolence, but those jerks told him, "Go away, I'm too busy with other matters to console you, orphan-boy!" Josh chatted with Brazilian/Mexican babes as Swiff walked the beach. Nary a friend was to be found for poor Joe the orphan. In desperation he ran off into the wilderness to commune with mother nature. King James dispatched a battalion of his finest men (named Slim, Antonio, and Bernardino.) to search for his lost subject, but Joe the orphan proved to be a cunning quarry. James' Italian buddies returned empty handed. The King then returned to his pressing paper, he was slowly closing in on page 3...

Meanwhile back at the ranch, Josh and Swiff returned from their exotic escapades to discover their comrades in disarray. Josh raised his face to the sky and cried "Oh, the calamity!" Someone took a picture, but sadly got the wrong end. Thus, Swiff and Josh hastily embarked on their trusty steeds into the wilderness in search of their lost drummer-orphan. After days and days of trekking, they found their fine friend curled up under a rock with a techno keyboard and a book of poems. His hair was not gelled to perfection. His designer clothing was in tatters, his collar un-popped. They sadly carried their fallen fellow back home. He was delirious, and muttered "Thank you, Daddy..." as they rode on into the sunset.

As they arrived back home, King James ran to greet them and waved his 5 page paper joyously in the air. There was much joy. Joe the orphan made a full recovery and took a shower. He was back to his normal two T'd self again.

So, if you've been wondering where in the world we've been, that's the story. We apologize for the disruptions in the normal flow of blog. Don't expect too much, though. You never know when the orphan might run off again. All that techno goes to one's head.

- Swiff

NP: This Holiday Life - The Fallout

PS. If you're going to Soulfest this summer, check the above fellows out. One of my favorite recent indie bands.

Go West, Young Man!

2005-04-21T14:22:00.000-04:00

I've been out and about over the past few days, visiting Greenville College. Armed with only my Brother's cheap digital camera and intense boredom, I have compiled for you a chronicle of my trip. Enjoy this special-edition photo-piffblog.

Who wears sandals and socks?? Hippies, that's who.

There's this big arch type thing in St. Louis.

We got lost.

So, we went to the arch. It's very big.

and shiny.

"The Mississippi Delta was shining like a National-O guitar..."

"I am following the river down the highway to the cradle of the civil war."
- Paul Simon

A little known fact: Greenville College is made completely from brick. Even the grass is brick.

"Write it in a letter, but the words didn't come out right."
- Mae
Postcards to be sent. I got the last George Bush one. Phew...

This mailbox was in the middle of the road.

"Free meal with 100 gallons!" We tried to fill up some buckets, but we still didn't have enough...

Day 2 at Greenville. One of the dorms. Note the barbed wire.

I missed Copeland by only a few days. Shucks.

As I took this picture, my mom commented on how no one smoked there.

These guys were tied together...

A new purchase at the recommendation of a highly regarded music critic.

On the way home: They make steak milkshakes there.

"When your only friends are hotel rooms..."
-Anberlin
Another postcard. This one actually has to do with where I went.

"I reach for my Tea and slowly drink in."
-Jars of Clay
Breakfast in Minneapolis.

John Coltrane in Minneapolis.

"I'd swim across Lake Michigan... To be alone with you."
- Sufjan Stevens
It's big too.

The line between time zones, approximately. Doesn't it look later on the left?

Back Home.

-Swiff

NP: Mae - The Sun and the Moon

The Studio - Weekend #2

2005-04-17T20:42:00.000-04:00

This weekend's studio sessions went well. We're almost done with the three songs we set out to complete. Maybe 1-2 hours left and all the tracking will be done. This time instead of Jim Begley, we were in the studio with Steve Drown who is absolutely amazing. He can hear differences in notes and tones that are past my understanding. The tracks went down relatively easy, at the longest: 5 takes, I believe. Expect a larger variety of sounds than on previous recordings, even from the EP. Josh and I switched around guitars a lot more than we normally do, both of us have expanded our use of effects pedals, so there are some cool delays and ambient tones in there now, and there's even some piano on "American Dream." In my opinion, the ending movement to "American Dream" is probably one of the best musical moments we've recorded yet.

If anyone told you the recording studio was the most interesting thing in the whole wide world, they lied. It is in fact, often the most boring place in the whole wide world. Seemingly thousands of hours are spent sitting, listening, sitting, banging heads on counter tops, and sitting. There's alot of sitting and waiting your turn. Unless you're Josh, then you stand in the recording area behind multiple feet of glass and have people stare at you all day, as you sing the same songs over and over again. This is how Josh and I entertained ourselves during the long process...

Let me explain this masterpiece. The large hairy thing playing bass is James (At the time, he was doing take upon take of bass lines.) he is growling. The house is one of his recent real estate ventures, and the 4 men out front are his mafia cronies that are helping him make mad cash. Their names are "Tony, Ronaldo, Slim, and Little Boss Sonny." The figure in the lower right corner is the beginnings of Josh's alien guy. You'll have to ask him about that one.

Come to our show tommorow. Everyone's going to be there. At least everyone's whos anyone will be. And certainly you are part of anyone. You wouldn't want to be excluded would you? J-Byn will be rapping. Joe will be dancing. James will be growling. Piffy will be wrapping things in cellophane.

4.18.05 - 5 PM
Portland, ME
Happy Wheels - Warren Ave.
FMI: 743-9503
$10.00 door.

- Swiff

NP: Death Cab for Cutie - Transatlanticism

Studio - Tommorow.

2005-04-14T21:20:00.000-04:00

Howdy. Everything is pretty much ready. Tommorow we will begin recording and hopefully leave saturday or sunday with 3 new songs. Joe really scared me just a few minutes ago, he told me. "We won't have Jim tommorow, his schedule is too full. Steve is coming instead." Now, the name "Jim" of course is sometimes short for "James." In this case, King James. I thought his comment meant that James had pursued a full time career in real estate and ditched PIF forever and some stranger named "Steve" was subbing in and playing sub-par bass. I was stunned, saddened, and sobbing. But, never fear. It turns out Joe meant Jim out studio tech, mixer, and everything else-man. Jim can't make it. Steve Drown is subbing in, he did our first demo. He's really really good. He's done Springsteen and stuff, I believe.

I have a dentist appointment tommorow before the studio. I hope they dont drill out all my teeth and make it so I can't sing, or drug me up so I can't function correctly. Watch out, PIF might be coming out wierd stuff... Joe's dad already told me "A long, cold winter" sounds like druggie music. It's not. I swear.

Wish us luck, have a nice weekend.

- Swiff

NP: Andrew Bird - A Nervous Tic Motion of the head to the left

Tightly sealed for freshness

2005-04-12T14:05:00.000-04:00

There it was just sitting there in the sun of the parking lot slowly decomposing. It was James' car. Just sitting there rotting while he was off festivating with the family at some classy greasy spoon establishment.

It was our love for King James that spurred us into action. It was our concern that his vehicle might lose its freshness sitting there in the sun that made us put our minds together.

We did what any other Big Poppa loving, civil, human beings would do. We knew that something had to be done to preserve the freshness of his vehicle. To not act would have been disrespect of the highest fashion. Joe came up with the first idea of placing the car carefully in a tupperware container. Afterall, everyone knows that tupperware seals in the freshness. But, after a quick search revealed that we were not going to find a 1,000 gallon tupperware container that would hold James' car, we had to come up with a new plan.

That's when we decided on the Seran wrap. We could seal the freshness in by wrapping the car in the space-age polymer known as pastic wrap. Thankfully we found a large roll and set about our loving task of caring for James' and his car. It was a job that was well-done.

We thought that James would return fattened from his family outting and be thrilled to discover that his car had been sealed for freshness. Oh how wrong we were. We heard the anger in his voice as he interpreted our loving actions as some sort of prank. Of course, being in fear for our very lives, we did what any other Big Poppa fearing human being would do ... we lied. We claimed we knew nothing of what he spoke.

What a perilous misunderstanding. Our concern had been interpreted as tomfoolery. It was a conundrum.

Then, to make things worse, pictures were published showing us in the act of sealing Big Poppa's car. There was nothing we could do. The jig was up and our cover blown. And now, because we lied, King James would cry, "Off with their heads!!!"

Today, we are all very remorseful and begging KJ for his forgiveness and understanding. Will he forgive? Will PIF break up in a disheveled heap of plastic wrap cast by the side of the road? Will we be wearing cement overshoes and swimming with the fishes?

No one knows. But if you don't see another blog for awhile call the police ...

Studio prep

2005-04-11T15:04:00.000-04:00

The weekend fast approaches, like Don Quijote in a mad windmill fighting rage, and with it another crazy weekend at the studio. However contrary to popular opinion, PIF is not comprised of angry giants, with the possible exception of that one fellow, James. We are ready to record 3 new songs this weekend in our trip to "The Studio" in Portland, "I'm the Lamest," "American Dream," and if we have time, "Mambo #6." Mambo #6 isn't the real title, but that is what we've decided to call it until we think of a good name. It was James' idea. The kid is a genius.

So, in preparation for recording, we've been getting prepped. Joe got new heads for his drums Saturday and I helped him put them on. James was supposed to help but he talked the whole time. He's not much of a multi-tasker. Actually, he's not much a single-tasker, either. Tommorow I'm going out to get new tubes for my amp and putting new strings on all my guitars, etc. Josh will be working on our tempos and giving his gibby a makeover. James probably will oil his padlock. There are two new friends that are coming with us this time which we didn't use for the first 3 songs: James' new bass and my new orange guitar.

Yesterday some hoodlums wrapped James' car in saran wrap. Can you believe it? What jerks. Some luck we've had with our cars lately. First piffy smashed his mirror, then my window got busted by those friendly Old Orchard Beach residents, now this. I'd say roller skating would be a much more reliable mode of transportation for us.

Whats that? You say roller skating is your favorite form of transportation too? You're in luck! We're playing at Happy Wheels in Portland Monday April 18 with our good buddy J-Byn. So come and show everyone your skills at skating backwards and stuff, maybe do a triple reverse side-twirl sheebang. We'll probably be debuting some new material. It will be fun. Rumor has everyone who's anyone will be there.

-Swiff

NP: Million Time Winner - Writing the Broken Line

Joe the Maestro

2005-04-09T17:03:00.000-04:00

Hi folks, I'm over at Joe's house. He's practicing his newfound skills of a guitarist. Right, now he's playing "Puff the Magic Dragon." It's not bad, except he's trying to sing, too. We went to the drum store to get him some new heads and then put them on his drums and tuned them since were going back into the studio this weekend.

The drum store is right next to a fine establishment called "The station." I went there a few nights ago to see the band Mae with a friend of mine and some of her pals. It's a swell place. We found out that they only pat down guys when you go in, so if your planning on bringing anything illegal in and you're a girl, you're all set. If you're a guy, then just give it to your girlfriend for safekeeping. A very efficient security system.

And guess who I saw at the show? That's right, everyone's favorite PIF message board music critic: EmoBoy, AKA "Charming Disaster." You should check out his solo work: www.purevolume.com/charmingdisaster. Amazing.

Joe's going on 5 minutes of "Puff." I wish a mic of some sort. There are many times in this band I wish I had some type of recording device. Joe dancing at a prom... Joe playing guitar... Pretty much any time James speaks. Such hilarity.

-Swiff

NP: Joe Tounge - Puff the Magic Dragon

A long, cold winter

2005-04-05T21:21:00.000-04:00

Here's an update on the world of PIF:

Last weekend we set up a makeshift recording studio in my living room. It was a mess. But we all jammed and worked on new songs and it was glorious. We worked on 3 songs: one which Josh has written called "Breaking Barriers," I believe. On the recording of this one, I play drums and Joe plays piano, just to switch things up. The second one Josh made up on the spot with James playing drums and Joe periodically entering the room and yelling at James. Joe is just jealous of his skills of a drummer. And the third one is one I wrote called "A long, cold winter." Joe plays both piano and drums (and Timbales.) on this one. Its on the message board, now at http://paidinfullrocks.com/mp3/PIFlcworiginal.mp3. We'll be debuting that one tommorow night at our show in Westbrook. You should come. The recordings are rough and certainly not mixed well at all, but have fun with "A long, cold winter" for now and maybe we'll get the rest to you someday. James' drumming is to die for.

Joe's parents moved to New York and left him, so he stayed with me this weekend. Poor kid. James now dresses spiffy like he got on one of those makeover shows. Color coordinated and everything. He puts us all to shame. And soon he will be a real estate agent raking in the dough like nobody's business. Josh is playing baseball now since its spring and stuff, so he'll probably be back on World Tour again soon.

Come to our show tommorow night. So long.

4.6.05 Westbrook, ME 7 PM
810 Main Street
Westbrook Warren Church
207 854-4793

-Swiff

NP: Radiohead - There, There

wow ... what a week

2005-04-03T16:21:00.000-04:00

Fri 3/25 - sonogram after a night of OW
mon 3/28 - doc says "surgery tomorrow to get a gall stone" - just one night in the hospital
tues 3/29 - ERCP surgery - "we found more stones" we need to go in and remove your gall bladder tomorrow and you can go home thursday
wed 3/30 - pain from ercp - owwww
thurs 3/31 - gall bladder surgery . they also did a "liver biopsy" that they did while in there
fri 4/1 - pain like crazy - not gonna send me home yet
sat 4/2 - 1:30 pm - home at last, pain and all
Sun 4/3 - laying on the couch, drugged up, typing this with 2 fingers on my right hand. starting to be able to move around more.

so ... that's piffy's tale of the past week. woot

April fools

2005-04-01T21:10:00.000-05:00

Joe and Josh are here at my house. Joe is playing poker on the computer. Josh is reading Guitar Player. James is coming down tommorow, after his business meeting. We're going to practice for our show on Wednesday and possibly record a song I have written. First, I have SAT's, though. And we forgot a couple cables so we have to go to radio shack to get them.

Joe wants to listen to Billy Joel, but he is too lazy to go downstairs and get my Billy Joel CD's. Now he's listening to MuteMath. Billy Joel...MuteMath..close enough. Joe can only listen to approximately 30 seconds of a song before changing to another. Kind of like Jubby. Just another Friiiiday Niiiight.

-swiff

NP: MuteMath - Peculiar People

A thousand apologies.

2005-03-30T17:19:00.000-05:00

So sorry we haven't blogged sufficiently lately. It was the lull before the storm, I promise.

Today, I have been asked to tell a story for the blog, and while James is certainly the finer story teller of our fearsome foursome, he is indisposed at the moment, studying Real Estate so he can get rich quick. So, in his stead I will proceed to tell you a timeless tale of love, hope, and stunningly intelligent animals.

The Tale of the Century
by Kienan Reilly

Once upon a time in neighborhood much like yours, there lived a small but resourceful bluebird who went by the name of 'Horatio.' Horatio was your average creature of the aviary persuasion, and he spent most of his time being chased by animals higher up on the food chain. And when he wasn't doing that, he could usually be found outside some sleepy soul's window at the crack of dawn, singing at the top of his lungs. Everyone loved his singing, especially when he sang a different song than what was presently playing on the radio (preferably Hillary Duff or Good Charlotte.)

One day, Horatio fell in love with a beautiful dog who lived in sorrow nearby. You see, this dog had but 3 legs, which of course is less than your average pooch. Like most dogs, no one liked her, and she didn't like anyone else either. She was a grumpy dog, and spent most of her time annoying people. However Horatio saw beneath this seemingly terrible canine, and fell head over talons in love. Presently, he flew down from his perch on a nearby smokestack and began to sweetly serenade his beloved. The grumpy dog hated singing (and everything else) so it promptly gobbled Horatio up.

The end.

All is well in the land of PIF. We are very excited about songs Josh and I have written. James is studying Real Estate. Joe is studying...Math and a sweet Stevie Wonder song. Josh is studying baseball and stuff. I am studying Bach. Come to see us in Westbrook next Wednesday, please.

-Swiff

NP: Iron and Wine - Jezebel

Life

2005-03-27T08:59:00.000-05:00

He takes men out of time and makes them feel eternity.
--Ralph Waldo Emerson

Desperation. Illumination. Restoration. Jubilation. Rejuvenation. Celebration. Elevation.
Easter.

The resurrection gives my life meaning and direction and the opportunity to start over no matter what my circumstances. ~Robert Flatt

Easter says you can put truth in a grave, but it won't stay there. ~Clarence W. Hall

It is the hour to rend thy chains,
The blossom time of souls.
~Katherine Lee Bates

Could life so end, half told; its school so fail?
Soul, soul, there is a sequel to thy tale!
~Robert Mowry Bell

Let every man and woman count himself immortal. Let him catch the revelation of Jesus in his resurrection. Let him say not merely, "Christ is risen," but "I shall rise." ~Phillips Brooks

The stars shall fade away, the sun himself
Grow dim with age, and Nature sink in years;
But thou shalt flourish in immortal youth,
Unhurt amid the war of elements,
The wreck of matter, and the crush of worlds.
~Joseph Addison

Christ has risen. He has risen indeed.

Shoot them below the belly button

2005-03-24T13:27:00.000-05:00

Advice from King James ... he's on the speaker phone. Let's listen in, shall we? Perhaps we shall garner some golden nuggets listening in to his side of the conversation.

"...out on the porch because it was too big of a clambake inside."

"I could take that bat away from him. Let's go out in the parking lot and try it."

"Cops go by smell."

"Have you seen the Abby kick? That's signature Abby."

"That's Abby and I am too lazy to get up and go say hi."

"So hopefully my cowlicks don't get in the way of my cool haircut."

"Why can't it be the same on both sides and be shapely? I've considered plucking hairs out of the other side to even it out."

"Today's highlight was my haircut. Tomorrow's highlight is spending the night at your house. I like to keep it going."

"Jagiscarl. We like to make up names and language. I was working on the alphabet but didn't get up to doing actual words."

Oyyyyy...

"I don't know if he has any fulltime friends."

"I gotta get her number and go from there. Too bad for Joe. Even if I don't succeed climbing Mt. Everest Joe's not going there."

"Hey dude, I got a beep, alright? I gotta go.

Man, those sloppy joes run right through you

2005-03-22T17:55:00.000-05:00

What should the title of the new CD be? Should it be something obscure, something deep, something random or something meaningful? It is a dilemna that keeps us awake at night. Well, maybe not that bad but we're open to suggestions.

We'll be hitting the studio in just three weeks to lay down some new hip and goovey beats. It would be cool to get The Lamest, American Dream and Mambo #6 down.

It was a busy weekend for the band ... the drive down to Nashua to Drifters to play a show for a couple friends (thanks for coming Liz) ... the House of David gig where billions of viewers always watch online over the internet (um, I hear it didn't work again?) ... Sunday morning we saw "B-Simp and the Worship Orchestra" and Sunday night we took in a rockin' Oneeighty set and saw Bobby Bishop. Sweet music ... sweet, sweet music.

The House of David is always a good time. This time we did some "American Idol" type stuff and just played music and let other people sing. It was funny. Swiff's little bro must have gotten into some bad chocolate milk or something. He was off the wall and kept us laughing.

Swiff, Joe and James are starting a jazz side project and looking for gigs this summer when Josh is on the road playing baseball. Their band name is "Jazz is just a bunch of random noises." (Nope, not really ... that's just what I think.)

We might be going back to Nashua sometime soon to play a gig for our Asian pals. They are cooler than a polar bear butt on an iceberg. We think it would be sweet.

We just got booked for a show with Passing Lane in Portland at the end of April and a return to the Alfred Town Square for the Alfred Festival Day in July. Last time we played the Alfred Festival there was a downpour in the middle of our set. It came down like someone was standing on top of the town hall with a fire hose. Hmmm ... now that I think about it ... maybe that's what actually happened. Maybe someone really turned the hose on us.

We have a bunch of Mondays and Wednesday and some Fridays open for this coming summer. We want to play at your campground, your picnic, your fireman's muster, your block party, your great-grandma's 90th birthday party (she'll love it, she can't hear a thing). So ... book a show ... bring us in ... feed us burgers ...

We've got some Saturday nights open too.

A week full of music, laughter and sharp things.

2005-03-21T21:57:00.000-05:00

Yes, that is my car. The window got smashed by some friendly lad while we were playing in Old Orchard. The people at the House of David were very nice. They stuck around while we waiting for cop slowpoke and helped me tape up a very stylish trashbag over the window and sweep up the glass.

Nick Adams opened for us for our 3rd show of last week. He's awesome. He used to play guitar and sing for the band IOTA who we would play shows with often. He did the whole acoustic thing and even played "Lonely People" by America which was excellent.

HOD was fun as always. As was drifters. James met his biggest fan.

More on all that tommorow. It's late and I'm tired.

-Swiff

NP: Explosions in the sky - Your hand in mine

The inner workings of bandom

2005-03-19T08:49:00.000-05:00

Here's a glimpse behind the scenes, up-close and personal into the inner workings of local bands out there playing the music ...

CAUTION: It may shatter your preconceptions and leave you totally underwhelmed and underimpressed by the band life.

Let's start with two basic truths:
TRUTH #1: Bands want to play gigs.
TRUTH #2: Promoters want bands to bring in the cash.

The first truth is where probably the majority of bands live - looking for gigs and just happy to find places that will let them play. I've seen bands drive 1,000 miles to play for 50 people and sleep on a floor.

One promoter contacted us awhile back with his pitch. Basically, he'd put us on the bill with three other bands and take care of all the details. All we had to do was guarantee him that we would sell 30 tickets at $15 a pop. He would then pay the band $1 for every ticket it sold. Wow. What a break, huh? For $450 he would let us play for 30 minutes and he would pay us $30. Do the math ... if a promoter gets 5 bands to buy-in like this he makes $2,250 and pays out $150. "Who would go for this" you ask? A ton of bands.

Then there was the big "battle of the bands" in Worcester where a promoter tried to tell us about the great exposure it would bring the band. We needed to guarantee selling 100 tickets at $10 each to have the privilege of being included. He told us if we sold more tickets we would get a better spot in the lineup. That meant with 10 bands he was bringing in a minimum of $10,000.

Sometimes we get asked why PIF doesn't do a bunch of battles of the bands. Well, to this point we've always seemed to have a gig somewhere to play. The "BOB" approach is another great way to put on a show for no money. Promoters can get 5-10 new bands to get excited about it. Bands love to see their name on a poster. Each band brings its posse of friends who buy tickets. The BOB promoter gets an instant party and bands are thrilled to play.

As bands get better known and can fill the role of "headliner" things change. They still sell the same number of tickets but they just don't have to do it by begging every friend and neighbor to buy a ticket. Promoters know that putting them on the bill will generate sales at ticket outlets and at the door. Headliners have an idea of their value and set fees and can begin to ask that their expenses be covered.

Another scenario that happens frequently is when people book a show and then do little to promote it. It is as though some think that all they need to do is book a band and people will come. The reality is that the real work starts AFTER the band is booked. Successful shows are the result of people who put up flyers, hand out bills and give personal invitations to everyone they know. Smaller crowds happen. Bands don't mind that if they know promotion attempts are made. It stinks when bands show up and play for 30 people knowing that next to nothing was done to promote the show.

PIF does some free shows and can afford to play for free when the band knows that 100 people will be in the house. Bands can estimate how many t-shirts and cd's they will sell based on the size of the crowd. Selling the merch pays for the expenses with a crowd of 75 or more. But a lot of bands have no merchandise because they never can afford to lay out the cash upfront to buy 100 shirts to sell. It's a vicious cycle.

One thing that is hard is when promoters overestimate their crowd size. We've had a a festival organizer tell us 1600 and then 71 people were there. We've had club owners tell us they normally have 80-100 and then we play to 30 friends and families of the other bands. We've driven 400 miles to play for "300" and then had 23 show up. That translates into costing the band money for gas, trailer rentals, meals and stuff.

The best approach when working with a band is to be totally honest and not get their hopes up. If they come ready to play for 30 and you have 50 show up, your band will be pumped. If you tell them 50-75 and have 30 show up, they can't help but be a little bit bummed out.

90% of local bands will come play at a worm wrestle. They just want to get gigs and play music. They will work hard for you. It's really cool when bands know that the people who book them are working just as hard to pull off a good show.

Pretty glamorous, huh?

Nashua ... sounds like Joshua except different

2005-03-18T14:21:00.000-05:00

Tonight the pif travelling hippy circus will be in Nashua clubbin' with some cool bands. Tomorrow night the circus goes to OOB to play the surf club. Then, Sunday we're takin' in a Bobby Bishop show in Portland (www.primetimefbc.com)

More bloggin' later ...

Taking it for granite

2005-03-17T14:28:00.000-05:00

Today I was parking at my school, and as my brother and I got out of the car, a grumpy old man driving by rolled down his window and yelled, "Get your bikes!" He was a kindly fellow. I think he was implying that young whippersnappers such as myself should not be allowed the benifit of driving their own car. Or maybe he wants me to consider the enviroment and conserve energy and gas. I'm hoping he drives by tommorow to. I hope to engage him in a roadside battle of wits. Maybe I will get my bike. Maybe I will get a bicycle built for two. If I get a bicycle built for two, the first thing I'm doing is inviting that friendly old man on a ride. Joshua has called to my attention that the old man in the car may have meant "You're bad at parking" when he said "Get your bikes!" I'd probably be worse at parking a bike. I might hit a resturant or something.

In other news, we had commenced our reunion tour (Josh has returned from his solo world tour) last night with a sold out show. It was not bad. We had fun. Thanks to everyone who came. We had a bunch of friends who showed up since it was in portland. A bunch of Josh's pals who went to Nicaragua with him and such.

So, I was just informed that it is St. Patrick's day. Happy St. Patrick's day.

One of our favorite regional bands, Mending Point, is breaking up. This saddens us. We've loved their debut ever since we saw them at Soulfest a few years ago. RIP Mending Point.

-Swiff

NP: Mae - The Ocean

Addendum:

Gasp! Swiff fails to mention the fun firsts of last night's show. I shall commence to fill in the gaps.

FIRST # 1 - More than 20 little, old grammies with blue hair and hearing aids sit comfortably waiting for the show to begin. They enjoyed the gospel quartet from the week before. During the second song they grab their walkers and make a mad dash to the door scowling like someone had swapped their denture cream with preparation H. We can't blame them.

FIRST # 2 - the stage is 12x16. Nice size. The problem is there is a 5x10 granite table in the middle that is not movable without a crane. To the side is a big pulpit thing - also not movable. So PIF plays in the 4 foot section in front of the stage.

FIRST #3 - Joe's ear monitors worked. Josh figured 'em out. It's what Bossy Josh does. He is also Fix-it Josh.

FIRST #4 - We finally got a set of mic clips for Joe's drums that work.

FIRST #5 - Sarah set a personal record for merch sales.

FIRST #6 - Scott broke the mirror on the burb. Dang it!

FIRST #7 - Dobbie kept having conversations with the St. Pius statue at the back.

FIRST #8 - James forgot his strap and his amp, Joe forgot a cymbal stand and Josh forgot his Dayquil. Swiff forgot some girl's name so he called her Amy. Good thing the show was in Portland.

But, all in all, it was a good time.

And now, we dance.

2005-03-16T14:17:00.000-05:00

Joe's old girlfriend from Texas was gonna fly out for the show tonight but she couldn't cause she's doing some modeling right now. That stinks. We like her bangs.

Tonight we shall dance ... dance like no ones watching ... dance like barefooted hippies on a Tennessee tar road in the heat of August ... dance like blobs of butter in a hot frying pan ... dance like little kids who have to pee real bad. We'll dance.

The bass will thumpa, thump, thump and vibrate through our innards, the guitars will go weedily, weedily, weedily and Josh will don a funny hat, or whig or something. There will be clever banter for no one to comprehend except for maybe KJ who will utter a silent guffaw.

The lights will pop on and off in rythmic fashion and the smoke will hide our drummer. And, at the end, a 13 year old girl will tell Josh he's hot and ask for his autograph. The goth chicks will dig Swiff (cause he's goth) and Sarah will sell a few shirts to help us replenish the Denny's fund.

It will be a glorious night tonight at St. Pius X in Portland, Maine. We built this city on rock and roll.

And we shall all eat soup.

You should definately come.

7 pm. Ocean Ave. St. Pius Church.

KJ's Real Estate

2005-03-15T15:31:00.000-05:00

King James is on a quest to get a real estate license. He's gonna make millions I tell ya. I mean, who wouldn't want to buy a house from James? He could sell an igloo on the equator to a guy with an ice allergy. I hear he's got the Brooklyn Bridge listing already. Contact him if you're interested.

Did we ever tell you about what came of the record deal? Well, basically it was a kid who threw together a cool website and declared himself a record label but had nothing to offer. "Um, I'm a record label but we don't produce records or do artist development or promotion or anything." We thought it was pretty sketchy. Oh by the way, we've declared ourselves the "Greatest Show on Ice" - we just don't skate or do anything on ice.

So now that Josh is back from touring the world we have three shows coming up this week. It will be grand and uber fantastic. We've been trying to keep a bunch of weekends free for recording sessions but it looks like the first free slot the studio has open is April 15-16. So now it would be cool to find someplace to play the first two weekends of April because they are free. We should play on a roof someplace and be U2-ish.

Joe is so cool. Just look at him. We all wish we were like Joe.

If you come to a show come say hi and tell us who you are. It's always a puzzle when people say, "Ya, I was at that show" and we didn't get to meet them. We want to talk to you. James wants to sell you real estate, Josh wants to show you his action figure moves, Joe wants you to take his picture (see above) and Swiff wants you to give him a sandwhich.

Peace out.

Get back, get back ... you don't know me like that

2005-03-14T18:19:00.000-05:00

KJ's cellphone kept ringing Saturday morning while he was sleeping in the other room. "Get back, get back, you don't know me like that." Over and over again. Who calls James at 9 in the morning? Hippies, that's who.

It was a Swiffless weekend. PIF 3/4 was snowed in at Josh's house while Swiff was down in the bunk of Kenne. We did miss his presence. Normally Swiff diddles on the keys and then switches to the bass and then reads a little of Guitar Player and then plays a little bit of Gamecube. KJ tells us stories of the newest advances in science and medicine and we say, "Uh huh ... yeah ... uh huh." Joe sits at the computer and checks the on-lineage action and Josh shoots Zombies or something.

But this weekend was a bit different as PIF 3/4 went to visit the ailing Abby. She had her ankle operated on. So, we visited her and brought her ice cream and then her rents order piles of pizza. It was a good time.

Josh's parents put the band to work shoveling and then rearranging a room. Joe is an experience mover guy now that he and Josh worked for a local business moving their stuff for carpeting.

13 inches of snow in Portland. Ick

Well, supper is ready ...

Igloo time.

2005-03-12T21:39:00.000-05:00

There is close to 2 feet of fresh snow outside my house. Apparently the latest storm affectionately dubbed by the populous "show-stopper" (for obvious reasons) was centered directly over my now igloo-like abode. We opted not to drive to Club Drifters. I suppose it was a good decision considering I couldn't even make it past the gigantic snow piles lovingly placed at the end of my driveway. I tried. It wasn't pretty. I suceeded in getting myself stranded on top of said piles. Unlike the post office, we do not operate in the face of all natural disasters. Next time you see your friendly neighborhood mail-delievery person, give him a big hug. Anyways, apologies to our 2 fans in New Hampshire.

Why do people always feel the need to discuss the weather? Look at that mess of a first paragraph. It's all about the weather. Everyone talks about the weather all the time. The weather might even be more popular than King James. Heresy!

We practiced last night. It went moderately well. Josh is recovering from his 5 colds. We came up with some fun stuff to do at Soulfest. Too bad you have to wait 6 months to see it. Ha! Mostly, James sat on the floor and tried to sleep. We also worked on some piano parts for the upcoming recording sessions. Whoah. Piano? Who do we think we are, Coldplay?

- Swiff

NP: The Chemistry Set - House of OK

Happy Anniversary, Joshua.

2005-03-10T15:17:00.000-05:00

Hola. I just got back from taking a Examen de Espanol that I missed when I was sick. I'm not very good at Spanish. I didn't know when Miguel Cervantes was born or died. Nor did I know how to say "To Put Up," "Tent," "To be exhausted" and a bunch of other words. Oh well. It happens. Josh is back from Florida. He had a killer time.

Speaking of Joshua, yesterday was the anniversary of The Joshua Tree's release. If you're crazy and don't own that album, go buy it, and be amazed.

I talked to an interesting person last night. It was pretty hilarious. He or she didn't believe that I was from PIF, even though our screen names say Pif(name) So, to prove my worthiness, they quizzed me on my biography from the website. For instance, here's how some of the conversation went. I can't remember the other person's screen name, so we'll call them "Doubting Thomas."

Doubting Thomas: Where do you go to school?
PIFswiff: Gosh that's a tough one, I'm going to have to go with Kennebunk High School.
Doubting Thomas: Darn, ok what type of amp do you play?
PIFswiff: A MesaBoogie Nomad 55.
Doubting Thoman: What is your favorite quote?
PIFswiff: "Hey, no touching."
Doubting Thomas: Hey! are you just copy and pasting from the website?
PIFswiff: No way, man. I've totally memorized my own PIFbio that I wrote 3 years ago.
Doubting Thomas: You like junky bands, you should listen to more Emo.

Ah, good old Doubting Thomas. I'll remember him or her well.

Adios (that's spanish for 'goodbye').

- Swiff

NP: Damien Rice - Older Chests

Tougher than steak forgotten on the grill overnight

2005-03-09T15:01:00.000-05:00

Scheduling PIF is tougher than steak left on the grill overnight.

Here's a peek into the life of the manager... woot.

I get a call, an email, a fax, a telegram, a carrier pigeon or whatever with a concert offer for a date. First I check all the schedules for sports and Josh's plane tickets for his jaunts. Then, I take that date and get it to the guys to see if it's a show they can play.

Something like, "Hey you guys, Betty wants to know if you can play at the annual worm wrestle championships in Podunk on the third Friday of June."

Swiff normally gets back to me within minutes with a resounding, "Huzzah! Yes! I'm available. Let's take it." (Swiff will play music anytime, anywhere for anyone. He's a music guy.)

Then I wait ... and wait ...

While I'm waiting I look at Joe's LAX schedule and Josh's baseball schedule and my youth group schedule and make sure I didn't forget something.

Then Joe comes online and has no idea I sent an email. In the meantime, I get an email from Joe's dad who manages his schedule. Joe's dad will say, "Yes, Joe can play the show. We'll drive directly from his game to the show. Can you guys load his drums and set them up? We'll try to get him there in time for sound check."

Back to Joe on IM ... Joe has no idea there's a show and a Betty from East Podunk is telling him that he does have a show. So Joe asks me about it and I fill him in and tell him the details. And he says, "Okay ..."

James calls looking for Josh.

"Hey, is Josh there?"
"Josh is never here."
"Where is he?"
"He's playing baseball on the moon."
"Oh yeah ... man, you wanna know some mean birds? Geese!"
(This is James way of saying, "Okay, I guess I'll talk to you then.")

So I tell James about the show. He doesn't check any schedules. He has no schedules. He is a free-wheeling man who is not tied down. So, James is in.

Then it's down to Josh. He comes in from practice or working out and heads straight to the shower because he's smelly and gross. He finally finishes and comes looking for food. He eats anything that is not moving and I tell him about the show.

He says, "Oh, isn't that the same day I fly home from that thing?"

"Yeah, but you fly in at 3:00 and the concert is at 7:00."

"Sweet. Let's do it," he says and gulps down a nasty protein shake.

So, my job is done. The show is on and everything is set. I email Betty back to say, "Hey Betty, it's a go!"

Then I get an email back and Betty says, "Oh, I feel so bad, I didn't check and there's a retirement party using the hall that night. Can you guys do it the next Friday night?"

Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

And so it starts again...

I think they should double my pay. Agree?

It's rowing

2005-03-08T14:51:00.000-05:00

It's not snowing or raining or snowing or raining. It's sort of all of it in one. One big precipitation fest. Or maybe it's rowing, but only because that sounds a lot better than snaining. When I drove home from school it was genuinely snowing, and the flakes were ginormous! Like the size of a small rock.

James has this week off, because he's in college and such. I imagine he's been out getting himself car #3. That James... he's a wild fellow. He's probably out wrestling a snow leopard as we speak. Those things are pretty hard to find on this side of the hemisphere, but I'll bet he's managed it somehow. Maybe even a whole herd of snow leopards.

Everyone is getting excited for Joe's annual renting of a beach house this summer. Mostly because of this crazy frigid weather. James is working out like crazy so he can be buff. I keep on telling him that all he needs to lie down in an unparallel with the flow of the beach and he'll meet like 20 girls within an hour. It's foolproof. Josh will probably be in Germany or Greenland or the moon playing baseball.

Someone just auctioned off a dime from 1894 for $1,322,500. Check your pockets.

-Swiff

NP: AfroCelts - Green

I'm an east coast kid livin' in Nashville, moved here in the winter when I got my record deal

2005-03-07T10:45:00.000-05:00

So ... this new record label contacts us and says, "Hey, heard your stuff, saw your site, see your fans ... looks like you're doin' the stuff and ready to move to the next level. We're interested in adding you."

So, we're like ... what's this? Is this another 16 year old kid who burns CD's in his basement and calls himself a label or is it legit?

So we go to their website. Woah, there we are, picture and all, listed on the "artists" page. Huh? Did King James sign a record deal or something and not tell us? Oh man, I can see it now ... we're gonna get paid in pongs and live off peanut butter sandwiches travelling from club to club playing for 6 guys playing pool. Pool balls hurt when they throw them...

So, we email and say, "Huh?"

They get back to us and are like, "You have a lot of potential and with a lot of hardwork we think we could dig having you on our label. But you gotta be willing to do the work. So, write us a deal and what you guys are looking for and we'll tell you if we think it's cool."

So, we're thinking, "Um, Jubby, is this you playing with our minds puttin' up a website and shmoozin' in the music biz?" I mean, who says, "Hey, write your own deal?" ... Hippies, that's who. Hippies.

So, we sent them the stuff we're looking for in a label. Boring biz stuff like producers, arrangers, cd production, promotion and marketing - all the normal record deal stuff. Oh yeah ... and we included a few of King James' demands ("I shall require all the land I can see while gazing at the stars.")

So now we wait with baited breath. Yeah ...

We'll let you know if anything comes of it ... or if just another weird thing that we record in the journals with the "Hey, would you guys be willing to tour with Dashboard for like $20,000 a show?" type of stuff. (Yeah, that really was a question we got. 20 grand a show? Heck, we normally play for just 18 grand a show. haha)

Then there was the, "Would you guys open for Zoe Girl?"

"Sure ... we just have to keep Joe from hitting on Zoe Girl ... is it just one girl? Is she named Zoe? If it's more than one girl we could have trouble containing our drummer. He digs older chicks."

But, nothing was as weird as the time we passed a Toyota Camry and saw a pony in the back seat. Honest ... it happened. We took a picture and have it somewhere.

Man ... I guess I'm rambling now ... it's the cold medication ...

Tina, you fat lard, come get your dinner.

2005-03-05T14:55:00.000-05:00

Greetings,

I'm at Joe's house. We've been jamming, doing music theory stuff. Now we're listening to the new Anberlin record, Never Take Friendship Personal while Joe tries to decide what to eat for lunch. I can't say i like it as much as their first record, but there are still some amazing songs. James is coming over later. But he has to get a ride from his parents because he smashed another car. But this time it wasn't his fault, some crazy truck driver hit his fancy van. This is a sad day in the world of motor sports. No longer will James race about the country in his big bulky multi-colored van.

Joe came back from Texas with all sorts of CD's that he bought. Maybe CD's are cheaper there. Now we're listening to David Crowder's Sunsets and Sushi. Imagine a crazy techno keyboard player holding David Crowder in a warehouse full of billions of wierd keyboard elctrono-effects, and that is this album. It's fun though.

Joe's cat scares me. It's kind of cross-eyed and always tries to sit on me. I don't like it. Their other cat died, it had a tumor in its stomach. No one liked it though. Cat's are wierd.

-Swiff

NP: David Crowder Band - Stars (From Mt. Wilson Observatory)

2005-03-03T19:34:00.000-05:00

Joe's muse is exploding. He wants to write a symphony or something. Perhaps a sonata for string quartet. I'm not really sure. I told him I would aid him in his musicality. The only problem is that he doesn't know any symphonies, string quartets, or big brass bands. Neither do I. I suppose we could just pull a Sufjan and play about 18 instruments each.

Tommorow night I was going to go see this awesome poet-guy named Bradley Hathaway, but sadly, I am not going. Check out his poem "The Annoying Hardcore Dude who went too far." It's AMAZING. Josh drove by Amazing on his way home from Boston. I want to go there! Or maybe not. Maybe I never want to go there.

Speaking of Josh he's out on the second leg of his world tour en route to Florida. Cardboard cutouts are 6.99$, please make checks payable to Kienan Reilly. In some instances a sandwich may substitute for said fee. Action figures are 4.99$ has 20 super moves including the "Blue Magnum" and "Faint on stage," Says 150 individual action phrases such as "peace," "you're a tool," and "We do this my way" (Bossy Josh). Limited edition Joe action figures coming soon.

-Swiff

NP: The Helio Sequence - Harmonica Song

"I will windmill kick you in the face!"

2005-03-02T10:33:00.000-05:00

Can you believe this is our third month of the piffblog? Wow, time flies when your having fun. And what's more fun than blogging? Maybe watching MTV. Or an online dating service. Sometimes I wonder if anyone ever reads this or if Piffy and I and occasionally James (when he's looking for a date) are only spouting out nonsense for our own amusement. Well we now know that Joe's not-so-girlfriend reads it. That was a suprise. We'll have to stop so blatantly commenting on his relationships. Joe may or may not have a girlfriend, if so, she may or may not be real or imaginary. I think that is sufficiently inconclusive. James had an imaginary girlfriend once, when he was like 6 or something.

Yesterday, I discovered that much of the music I have been listening to lately (Sufjan Stevens, Iron and Wine, Damien Rice, etc.) is "Gothic." This came as a suprise. I always thought gothic music was those guys with black eyeliner and skulls painted on their guitars, but Relevant magazine set me straight. Maybe that stuff is Goth-core. Not mall-core. Genres confuse me.

Tommorow Josh leaves for Florida. I think he's on a solo world tour and just not telling us. All that orphanage in Nicaragua stuff? He was really gigging all sorts of Latin American clubs. Now he's off on his second leg. Fine! I can make it on my own. Joe and I will gang up and play all sorts of Jazz-fusion acoustic introspective epics that no one would ever want to listen to. Take that. Just kidding, PIF is not breaking up, in case you didn't catch the sarcasm. I wouldn't want to start some type of wildfire-spreading rumor. Rumors are bad.

-Swiff

NP: Bradley Hathaway - The annoying hardcore dude that goes too far

Blizzard Shmizzard

2005-03-01T12:44:00.000-05:00

Bah ... they call this a blizzard? Heck, in my day blizzards were so big that the entire world would shut down and houses would get burried with 10-12 feet of snow. Bah, 10-12 inches? Big deal. We have more frost than that built up in our freezer.

So school is cancelled again. I heard a rumor that Portland now goes to school until June 22. Sheesh...

Last night I was talking to Piffers online from Colorado, Maine, Massachusetts, Tennessee and Cali ... that was kinda hard to keep track of but it was fun.

It's a good thing that we have no shows lined up and Josh is travelling because he's still couging up a lung and has no voice. Must be one of the providential things ...

King James was just on our answering machine. Seems he was contemplating getting out of bed. It was about noon. Ahhh, the life of a king. He probably has someone there feeding him grapes.

I think Swiff should put hippy flower stickers on his car and maybe a guy with an afro . Yeah, hippy car for Swiff.

Got some cool new mic clips for Joe's drums. That's what Joe needs ... more volume. haha Actually, it will help us get better live recordings and provide a fuller sound in the larger venues.

Speaking of larger venues ... we're going back to the House of David Surfriders Club in Old Orchard Beach, Maine Saturday, March 19. That's always fun. It's like playing in a big living room. We'll have to come up with something crazy to do. That's our HOD tradition. Maybe we'll find matching leisure suits ... hmmm. It's totally laid back and just a real good time.

I wonder if Sarah will be making the road trips with us? She's swell and does an uberfabulous job with the merch. Plus, with Sarah and all the band members' girlfriends along too ... that adds ... um, let's see .... one person to the crowd. Joe had a girlfriend once ... she never came to a show though. Josh's piano teacher had a crush on him ... she was like 80 or something...

So ... that's about all I can blog for now ... I am blogged out.

Peace.

The eve of the Blizzard of Tuesday

2005-02-28T07:59:00.000-05:00

Joe got stuck in Detroit Saturday night - darn overbooked flights - so he didn't make it back for the PIF reunion. It was just James, Josh and Swiff and a couple Betties hangin' out and watching The Forgotten and eating bowls of Chex Mix. A word advice - when selecting a movie to watch with James, make sure to get a comedy because he likes to try to make jokes throughout the show no matter what the theme of the flick is. Kings feel they have the right to do that.

Back to school ... back to school ... but it looks like mom nature has a blizzard planned for tommorrow so that means a potential snow day. Woot.

Josh has no voice ... he sounds like a pubescent 7th grader squeaking after every other word. He's coughing up a storm ... not a blizzard but more of a thunder storm ... and sounds unhealthy. Wonder if those antibiotics did the trick for him. Time to get Joshy back to the doctors. Remember? It was this time last year when Swiff had bronchitus and Josh passed out on stage during the 14 shows in 8 days vacation marathon. Good times ... good times ...

Just discovered that Clubdrifters charges a $10 cover. So, March 12 bring $10 to get in. Yeah, $10 is a lot of sweet moola ... but there will be 4 or 5 bands so when you break it down to cost per song it isn't much at all.

Well, boys and girls ... this blog must now come to an end.

FOR LUNCH: Easy Mac or Spaghettios?

Peace out.

It's hip to be square

2005-02-25T18:41:00.000-05:00

My sister is watching Bambi. What a classic. Bambi has square spots, check it out next time you watch it. Not regular round spots like a liger, and not pentagonal spots like a soccerball. No sir, square spots. I wonder if real deer have square spots. I've never really looked. I bet they don't. I'll ask James. He's probably trapped a deer with only an empty tin can and a twizzler. Bambi's girlfriend has square spots. It's hip to be square.

Josh should be back by now. Rumor has it he was last seen in Miami. I guess he's decided to sell the banana farm and come on home. Joe comes back tommorow. I hope hes sufficiently skilled in wrangling now.

Never mind, Josh just called. He is riding in a bus from Boston to Portland with all his new Nicaragua friends. He had fun. He didn't get malaria or anything. Soon, PIF will be reunited. Huzzah!

-Swiff

NP: Sufjan Stevens - The Transfiguration

Testing 1,2,3 ... Is this thing on?

2005-02-24T13:46:00.000-05:00

July is creeping up on us faster than a jackrabbit being chased by a ... well, some really fast animal ... like maybe a liger or something. Nah, a liger would just use his magical powers to catch a jackrabbit so that's probably a bad analogy. Anyway, we're hoping to have the full-length cd done in July. That means we gotta start getting into the studio for some serious blocks of time soon. We need probably another 50-60 hours. Looks like we may tackle 21 hours or so at the end of March and then another 21 hours the second weekend of April if the time slots are open. Then, we should be able to put the thing to bed over April vacation. That would give the month of May for mixing and mastering and then June for production. No sweat ... there's just all the artwork to do in addition to that. Oy...

James is making up a new language. I think we should appoint him king of the band and then we can call him King James. That would be cool because those fundamental places that want us to play music always want to know if we are diehard supporters of "King James." We could say, "Oh, definitely, we love King James" and then go in and rock their socks off! Woah, boy, that would be as enjoyable as searching for a marble in the bottom of a bowl of razor blades. And ... we wouldn't be lying either ... because we do love James. Doesn't everyone?

King James just IM'd me to say, "first order as king i will require a round table a super sceptor and a crown ... and all the land I can see while looking at the stars." Demanding fellow, dontcha think?

Josh is due home tomorrow unless, of course, we were right in our earlier blog guess of his eloping and starting a banana business. When he comes home there will be much rejoicing in the land.

Joe is due home from Texas Saturday and we shall kill the fatted calf, raise our goblets and shout, "Huzzah!"

So, the band will be together for about a week and then Josh will leave for Florida to look at a college and visit Mickey Mouse with the Dello and his rockstar-haired brother Jake. Sheesh ... stay home kid, would ya?

The King has just IM'd with another demand, "And maybe a choco-taco." I don't know if this King thing is gonna work out.

Oh man ... King James is making my sides hurt from laughter!

Yes, I said that.

2005-02-23T21:08:00.000-05:00

I just saw our friend Bryant Barr on TV. He was playing basketball for Falmouth High in some type of basketball tournament. He scored a 3-pointer. I'm pretty sure thats hard or something, right? I used to play basketball in a rec league or something. All the teams had cool names like the Strikers, the Warriors, or the Cougars. Very impressive names. Like most of my childhood sports, Basketball didn't work out too well. The anouncer just said it was "a tremendous quarter of basketball for Bryant Barr." He's so famous.

I wen and picked up my new car today. Glorious. James has a big Economics test tommorow, and a "the worst headache of his life." If he gets an A, he gets an A in the class. Lets hope he gets an A. A's are good. Everyone likes an A every once in a while.

There has been much movie watching for me lately. My brother is out of the hospital and movie watching is pretty much all he can do. We been watching all the classics: Bambi, The Lion King, Mary Poppins. Good times.

-Swiff

NP: Iron and Wine - Love and Some Verses

Shows and rumors of shows

2005-02-21T22:56:00.000-05:00

Another day ... another 9 inches of snow and a few more bookings taking shape. Couple of cool possibilities in the works with some national acts. We can't say who yet because 95% of them seem to fall through or never come together ... but if they do materialize we will let ya know.

Visited Swiff's bro in the hospital today. He's doing much better today and starting to move around. He had pectus excavatum which meant he had an indent in his chest that needed to be popped out

No word from Josh - day 5. Hope the banana crop is starting nicely.

Heard a Russian JC Penney cashier say, "Please give to me the bar code for the dancing duck." That sounded like something out of a bad spy movie. We bought the dancing duck for Swiff's bro.

That's about it in the land of PIF ... yawn ...

All's quiet on the homefront

2005-02-20T13:40:00.000-05:00

Shhh ... you can almost hear it. It's the sound of no Bubba-D ... Kinda sad how we're rattling around this drafty, old house of life with no Joe. Texas must be much louder about now.

No one has heard from Josh since he left Miami. Rumor is that he made it to Nicaragua okay. What has occurred after that point? Only the Lord knows. Well, the Lord and the inhabitants of Nicaragua.

Perhaps he and Yoko have eloped and adopted two or three of the little orphan children and have started a life together of raising a banana crop and weaving Spanish garments to sell in the market. If he does not come back Friday we will know that is the case. Stay tuned ...

Swiff has his own wheels. It is a car in need of a name - a wagon that is just dandy for loading amps and his bazillion guitars into when meeting up with the circus.

James has been house sitting and also tending his grandparents' farm. The chickens have been making his life miserable. Darn chickens. One of them got in with the geese and it wasn't a pretty sight at all.

TSR Radio picked up some PIF tune. We don't really know what TSR is or where they are playing it or what they are playing but we got an email saying they were playing it so ... um, that's neat.

Have a good vacation if this week is a vacation for you.

Oh, the monologue.

2005-02-19T21:12:00.000-05:00

Tonight I went to the movies with a friend of mine, we saw Hitch, the number one movie in America according to the TV. All I can say is that I wish I had that man's scripted eloquence. The guy was like a walking fortune cookie. He was always throwing around proverbs and ponderings like it was no one's business. There was a dog in it like mine, but it had 4 legs. But I liked it, she did too. Two thumbs up. Just like those guys who would talk about movies on TV but then one of them died. I forgot their names.

Tommorow I'm going to stay with James at Joe's house, which James is guarding with his life. Monday we're going down to Salem, Mass. to a Bill Malonee (ex-Vigilantes of Love) show with Dobbie who has a connection with some guy who is running it, so we're getting in free, and selling merch. I wish Dobbie knew U2. That would be swell.

James and I went to look at a car today, I'm getting it. Now I will have sweet wheels. I can't start it with a remote though, shucks. I think James approves of it though. He didn't say anything like, "my car can go faster than that" or "there's some rust here... my car is better."

-Swiff

NP: Copeland - Love is a Fast Song

I am Pedro Sanchez

2005-02-18T18:51:00.000-05:00

Today, I was just minding my business, living the life, when all of the sudden my head started burning up! It was like a huge fever that you get and then you start having crazy dreams and such. Just like Pedro in Napoleon Dynamite, minus the bath and the head shaving, but I considered the latter. If only to get a cool wig later. But the whole burning head thing only lasted for a few hours, luckily. After, I sadly returned to real life and had to stop pretending I lived in Idaho and rode a sweet bike.

Tommorow James and I are going to look at a car for me. James loves looking at cars. I'm sure his car will be better than this one, but Ill just have to settle for second best in the world.

So, its February Vacation now. I hope you all have your President's birthday parties planned. I know I do.

-Swiff

NP: Coldplay - Politik

Beneath Medicine Tree

2005-02-17T20:31:00.000-05:00

This February has been a very hospital month for the guys of PIF and I. Our friend Jen is in the hospital because her pancreas died on her or something terrible like that. James' Grandma broke her hip and had to have surgery. James' friend Pat might need surgery too. My brother has surgery tommorow on some of his ribs, and our friend Emily has surgery next week on her knee. Lots of surgery. Please pray for all these folks.

On a lighter note, most everyone has a February break starting tommorow. I think that deserves a "Huzzah." The year is basically over, I mean, after february break theres a few weeks of school then St. Patrick's day, after that the spring equinox, and then Palm Sunday, and then a fabulous day, March 22, which includes such monumentous events such as the release of new Copeland and Jars of Clay albums and important birthdays, as well. Then you hop right into Passover, Good Friday, Easter, all sorts of fun holidays to keep your mind of all things scholastic. Then you have Spring break in April, and then Cinco de Mayo, my birthday, Mother's and Father's days, Flag Day, and if you're not out of school by then you're probably in Summer School. So remember, folks keep your eyes on all the fun holidays out there and the year will be over in no time. I didn't even tell you about all the fun full and no moon days!

So Joe is safely in Texas right now, probably wrangling some cows or checking out an Eisley concert, hopefully the latter. Josh is off in Nicaragua speaking in spanish, just like PifPunk. James is at Joe's house house-sitting and cat-sitting. I'll probably go up this weekend and hang out for a few days there, make sure he doesn't burn the house down. You know, because he's so hott. With two T's.

Piffy, Dobbie and I brainstormed ideas for new T-shirts today. All Dobbie did was quote Napoleon Dynamite and put PIF in front of it. Stuff like, 'PIF... Come get some ham!' or 'PIF... Just follow your heart, that's what I do.' Piffy made some designs for ones that say 'I'm the Lamest' and 'Betty Hearts PIF.' I still think we should sell cardboard cutouts of Josh.

-Swiff

NP: Dave Matthews Band - Grace is Gone

2s Day ramblings

2005-02-15T18:57:00.000-05:00

Why do people in ship mutinies always ask for "better treatment"? I'd ask for a pinball machine, because with all that rocking back and forth you'd probably be able to get a lot of free games.

Bronchitis Josh still sounds like a seal. It makes me think I am at Sea World. I expect that at any moment a crafty little otter will come by and try to steal my sword. He will be mighty surprised to discover that I dropped my sword off at the Salvation Army store years ago when I dropped out of swashbuckling school.

I dropped out because I thought one of the courses should have been "Laughing, Then Jumping Off Something." But nooooooo .... that was not the case at all.

Soon Joe will be in Texas. I've heard that all his ex's live in Texas. It may just be a rumor though.

I was wondering if trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.

PIF has been getting a bunch of bookings for the spring. If we had Josh's baseball schedule and Joe's LAX schedule we would be able to plan a whole lot better. So, right now, we're just telling everyone to hang tight.

What do you think? Is it crazy to play a show in Boothbay on Friday night and then another show in Rockland on Saturday night with Joe and Josh probably both having games to play Saturday morning? Hmmmm ... We've done some crazy things before...

We need to order some more t-shirts and stuff ... there just ain't enough time in the day, I tell ya. We still need to design the new ones too. We're thinking maybe a retro type shirt with BETTY on the front or something and a picture of Joe on the armpit. (no, just kidding about the Joe part) Got any ideas? What would be a cool shirt?

That's about all there is for now. Special thanks to Jack Handy for injecting absurdity into this blog entry ... like this free advice:

If you ever fall off the Sears Tower, just go real limp, because maybe you'll look like a dummy and people will try to catch you because, hey, free dummy.

There something wonderful (pitiful) about love.

2005-02-14T15:55:00.000-05:00

Will you be my valentine? Perhaps just my best friend?

Love is in the air, my friends. I can practically see the fabled winged infants flying about. I was wounded by one. My eyes turned into little red hearts and I fell into needless fits of babbling. Kind of like Thumper in Bambi when he got twitterpated. Those little cherub-men, they're tricky fellows. You never know when one is going to sneak up on you and strike. Bam! Watch out for them. And remember, "Love is when you get mad at someone and don't break up with them." James told me that once. James would know. Hes such a romancer.

Our winter retreat was fun. We played a crazy game of broom-ball and then football. I mostly made snow sculptures of states during the footbal but I did score one touchdown. Can you believe it? We met this way cool guy names Jim Trick who was speaking and playing guitar there. He was good. www.Jimtrick.com, check him out. He was a big U2 fan, but who isn't? He was mad when I told him I didn't like How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb. And also a big The Choir fan. Woot. I was digging his style.

James couldn't sleep the first night, neither in the bed, nor the floor, nor the chair. Joe kept on elbowing him in the back apparently. So, he decided at 3 in the morning to go in the bathroom and wash his face for half an hour before his shrine of stolen hotel bathroom toiletries. He woke everyone in the room below us up. What a guy. Josh is sick, and coughed a lot. We decided were going to make a recording of all the hilarious things James says and just carry a tape recorder around with us at all times. I bet a tape of James' wisdom would sell like hotcakes. Especially if it smelled like hotcakes. I'd buy one.

How was your valentines day? Did you get any secret love letters? Perhaps a boquet of 500 red roses? A boquet of 500 dead roses? Now thats romantic.

-Swiff

NP: Sufjan Stevens - That Dress Looks Nice on You

Extreme makeover weekend

2005-02-13T18:13:00.000-05:00

yawn ... exhausted, tired, fulfilled ...

an awesome weekend with the phenomenal Jim Trick speaking and us leading worship. Jim was so transparent and honest and really helped us look at Christ. "Jesus is not coming back to get church people. He's coming back for believers." It was just very good all around (www.jimtrick.com) Plus, Jim's a great musician.

Worship went well with Josh the barking seal (he is sick with a cold - COUGH COUGH). Seriously, pray for him because he leaves for Nicaragua in a few days and sounds like he has bronchitis or something.

Swiff brought both his ladies to the retreat. They seemed to get along fine.

Joe has an attraction for blue-haired girls. That was a discovery.

James had a makeover:
http://www.primetimefbc.com/gallery/snowcamp05/snowcamp05%20106.jpg

Ugh ... sooo tired ...

Nuh night

Precipitation Day

2005-02-10T17:24:00.000-05:00

And the world chanted together a resounding "Woot."

It didnt start snowing here until noonish. So I had more of a rain day. Then there was ice, now its snowing. Hard. Maybe there will be a bona-fide snow day tommorow. Speaking of snow, this weekend we're travelling to Lake Winnepasaukee of Steve Hindalong fame to play at our church's snow camp. That should be fun. James' first time playing with us was at this camp 2 years ago. A fateful day. I remember the first words he ever said to me were "Bad Burrito." That night he called his bunk: "cursed child-bearing bed!" Our first experience of the absurdity that is James Horr.

If you change the R's in James' name to T's then he is James Hott. With 2 T's. 2 T's means you're extra hot. Kind of like that whole jalepeno pepper I had eat once as a part of a game. That was a pretty cruel game. But, what do I know? Joe is the expert on hott, especially the 2 T'd variety.

James gets to house-sit Joe's house while Joe and his parents are visiting his brother in Texas. We're going to throw some wild parties. Just kidding. I think it's mostly to watch out for Joe's cat. I hate that cat. It always tries to sit on me like it knows im allergic to it. Plus it has wierd teeth. It's almost as despicable as the Krabbe-Fish. Josh is going with Yoko to Nicaragua to help out at an orphanage and other assorted charitable activities. James and I are going clubbing.

Last night I went out and bought Eisley's debut, Room Noises, I'm a big fan of most of the songs. I heartily recommend it if you're into artists like The Innocence Mission, Sixpence None the Richer, Coldplay, ect. I hope you had a splendid precipitation day, or if you had to go to school/work today, I hope you didn't get snowed into your school/place of work. That would be the worst. I mean, best. School is the swellest.

-Swiff

NP: Eisley - Brightly Wound

Nor'Eastah!

2005-02-09T17:30:00.000-05:00

The excitement is in the air thick like maple syrup on a chilly, fall day. Another snow storm is about to unleash its furry on the Northeast. Woot. I like snow.

It's decision time. Newsound needs to know what song we want on the compilation cd that goes out to about 6,000 people this spring and summer. We've had music types select each of the three. Hmmm ... so we need the public's opinion on this one.

Which song should we put on it?
- Falling Behind
- Good Old Days
- Hold Me

(hear them at http://www.purevolume.com/pifpaidinfull),

We've heard rumors of an unofficial PIF fan club website. Actually, we visited it and saw that it had some boring old, Josh conversations and exuberant Swiff installments and some pictures of some ugly band. You can take a look at
http://www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=pifteenyboppers4lyf. It's entertaining, unnerving and a little bit weird all at the same time.

The official PIF fan club website is at:

Official site

We're working on some designs for new shirts and stuff. They will be way cool and off the charts groovy. Joe's mom will buy 4.

Our TN friends aren't going to school because everyone in their state is flu infested. Our WI friends are eatin' cheese. Our NY friends are gonna get snow too. Our Asian friends are gonna come to the Nashua show and bring Swiff a sandwich or make us go to costco or something. Our Augusta friends are gonna open a "Boston Chowdah Celcius" franchise. Our Portland friends are still lickin' their Krispy Kreme bags (Sarah!)

We saw that a youth group in CT has a Congress poll and PIF is in the lead ... kinda funny. Check it out ...
Looks like a cool youth group.

That is about all the news that has blogged forth on this fine Nor'Easter eve.

Okay ... comments ... let 'em flow.

"can there be more coolness?" dare i ask, as to a response i say me'bay

2005-02-08T16:47:00.000-05:00

i must say much fun was to be had this past weekend. it was a time filled with great festivus for all of us. the sheraton was just a hoot. we had special rooms that were claimed of a certain band member from a certain state in which i will only say their state bird begins with a chick and ends with an adee not to let "normal people" as to a sort climb such a later of such sophistication. however sophistication aside i must say the people were fun...quite fun. infact even as leaveing the bathroom i hand people yelling good job. i was not sure what i did but far be it of me to turn away a congradulation. the weekend was fun but also had its scientific endeavors. firstly how long can a european occupy a dry-sauna...its roughly about 60min where as to i a non european spandex wearing abomination can only hold for about 20min. imagine there to be such a difference in the ability to displace time in such conditions of dry heat. then we move to the great feasting from such places as the sample guy's own "sakio" and the magnanamous Flamers. as to what swiff has previously mentioned about a conversation with a young lady that was also a test of science. although i dont reccommend this to be done at home it is a good survey to test. find a busy hallway with about 2-300 individuals hangingout and wandering amongst the corridors then stratedgeryly place yourself in the middle of the hall and lay down in a non parrallel reference to the corridor....and wait. before long you will have a conversation. if that individual is reading this and above the age of 16 my hobbies are weightlifting,music,theological studies and long walks on short beaches. well time is a factor and to this i must say adue, but i leave you with this "i am a traveling freak show however dont nobody not like this circus." with all that is sarcastic,cinic,and premorphorus,
PIF James

Where is this circus headed?

2005-02-08T15:14:00.000-05:00

Talked to a guy in the muzic biz for about an hour yesterday about producers, arrangers, mastering and stuff. Got lots of mind-spinning advice like, "You guys need to get out to the GMA Conference in March in Nashville to start learning how things work in the music biz." How things work? We thought it was like this:

Betty: You guys should play at my gig because you are hot.
PIF: James is hot.
Betty: Yeah, but it would be so cool to have you play.
PIF: Can't get a good band, huh? Decided to go with us?
Betty: Yeah ... um, I mean NO! You guys are really good.
PIF: James is really good.
Betty: Can you do it?
PIF: Um, since none of us ever have dates or anything, I bet we're free that night.
Betty: Why don't you have dates?
PIF: We're lame. That and the fact that we're never around because we're always out with this travelling hippy circus helping people get their funk on.
Betty: So, can you come play?
PIF: Uh, yeah, I guess so.
Betty: Awesome. This is going to be the best thing to happen to our town since we all gathered around and pulled aunt Nelly's goat outta that well.
PIF: Swell.

We thought it worked like that. This Nashville stuff and talk of mastering and if "Podunk Hillbilly Records" wants to sign us is all pretty confusing. We gotta find someone who knows what they are doing to tell us what to do. I bet James knows a guy.

Some girl posted on the message board that Josh is boring to talk to online. That was funny. We're gonna send him to Dale Carnegie's school of online exuberance training and pray that he overcomes this recent hurdle. We're all pulling for him ...

Swiff left Henrietta behind this weekend. Ditched her for Gina. We saw it coming though he denied it at first. Next thing we know he'll be running off with some lady wrestler in a paper hat or something. Fickle lad.

James met his soulmate in Boston. Darn ... he didn't get her name. If you are his soulmate just let us know and we'll have the papers drawn up.

Joe shaved his goatee awhile back. We asked him if he mailed it to someone and he claims not to have done so. I suppose the postage would have been outrageous from the weight of all that chin hair. Someone said Joe looks old this weekend ... not old, old but old. Whatever that means.

Josh has been working diligently on a new song, Swiff rhymes with riff, Joe still won't do a drum solo and James needs a haircut.

A word of advice for you - don't ever call Panda Garden to ask for the number to the Boston Chowder Company. They don't like that at all.

Well, circus clowns, it's time to pull this tiny car off the blog highway and put it away until next time. Try the cotton candy, it's to die for.

"Amazing!"

2005-02-07T13:49:00.000-05:00

(Congress weekend, the sequel)

This weekend was monumental for our big, goofy, bald bass player. Life-changing. Firstly, he got to live the life of a rich guy (sort of) at the Sheraton, complete with bathrobe. Very posh. Secondly, he got to eat at his all time favorite restaurant, Flamers. Thirdly he met the love of his life through a window pane in the mall. Fourthly, he had a genuine conversation with a girl his age without saying anything completely absurd ("GEESE!"). We're proud of him.

We met a lot of funny people at congress. There were these two really short girls from Gordon who were security guards. We were pretty sure they had their firearms hidden somewhere, but they never owned up. Then there was this guy who drew with chalk, and he did this drawing of a city and mountains and stuff. He was probably the Picasso of chalk. Or the Monet of Chalk. He was really good. http://www.chalkguy.com/ And of course, the Krispy Kids. They must have had 300 Krispy Kreme hats. James wore one to the Superbowl. So stylish.

So, Sunday was the Superbowl and everything. I love football. By far the greatest sport of all time. All that running and smashing and throwing and smashing and jumping and piling. Good stuff. We had a big bash at our church with maybe 100+ kids. Our friends 180 played before and during the half time show. Not with Paul, unfortunately. They're way cool. Joe was really into the game. It was pretty funny. I slept through some of it. Dave was there and he had his laptop hooked up through the sound system so that he could play all these Napoleon Dynamite clips such as "Idiot!" and "Lucky..." and "Gosh!" He's the coolest. So, if you're a Patriots fan, have fun today basking in your glory. If you were for that other team (I can't remember who they were), don't do anything drastic.

-Swiff

NP: Death Cab for Cutie - Transatlanticism

Best weekend EVER.

2005-02-05T23:44:00.000-05:00

... Like anyone could ever know that.

But, nonetheless, it was fun. The sound system was nice and the people were nice and the lights were all flashy-crazy-go-nuts. We got to stay in the high-class section of the Sheraton, Floor 26+. Here's the rundown on our Congress.

Friday night we got there and soundchecked then we went to our rooms. James' review of the hotel: Complemetary bath-robe= very good, 5 NOT 6 pillows, as specified= very bad, 2 bottles of lotion, no shampoo= very very bad (why would James need shampoo, he's bald?) The first thing James did was put on his bathrobe. It went down to somewherea round his knees. He looked very sophisticated. After we explored our rooms, we went up to the lounge that only people on the top 3 floors can go to. Very priveliged. The average age in the room was maybe 60 so we didnt stay long. Just long enough to eat a couple plates full of shrimp in a blanket hor' deurves (Or Durvs). Then we high-tailed it, because we were getting wierd looks. Then we went for real food at a Japanese resturant. It was amazing. James wanted to go to Flamers for burgers but we didn't. Then we checked out the pool, overrun with Speedo-sporting old guys. Who stole the sauna from us multiple times. Then we went to bed.

Saturday we basically just played music and talked to cool people. We had fresh fruit for breakfast in the rich person lounge again. It was delicious. This time the average age was maybe 45. Not so many wierd looks. Joe even talked to an old lady and she didn't us. We met a lot of people we knew and some new friends. The Krispy-Kids aka the Krispy-Kreme-Krew were especially memorable. Yes, they sure were memorable alright. We ate dinner at Flamers that night with our friends Emily and Laura and Savannah. James was happy. Emily is not on crutches anymore. We didn;t even have to walk too slow for her. And we did not kidnap anyone, I promise. But she has surgery soon. Then we hung out for a while longer, and went home. Now we're at Josh's minus Joe and going to bed, it was a tiring weekend. Thanks to all who were so encouraging and worshipped with us. It was fun. Goodnight.

-Swiff

NP: Anberlin - Never Take Friendship Personal

PIF to play at Congressional Gala.

2005-02-03T18:50:00.000-05:00

Democrats and Republicans plan to set aside their petty differences and rock out with us Saturday. Nothing like a little national unity, that's what I always say. Or maybe we're not playing at that congress. I guess its some imposter in Boston. I think James should run for Congress. If you vote for James, all your wildest dreams will come true.

Yep, so we're going down to Boston Friday night to lead worship at Congress. Jeff Deyo and Bobby Bishop will be there, too. "Say Bobby!" I hope he brings his I-pod DJ. That guy is the best. We love playing at places like this. Lots of 12 year old girls fall in love with Josh, James gets to go strut his stuff at the hotel pool, Joe gets to eat lots of food, and smear even more all over his face. Good times. Last time we played at a hotel convention like this we played 5 shows or something along those lines. It was fun. I remember there was this old guy there who instead of introducing himself or shaking my hand or any other normal type of greeting asked me Titanic trivia. Not the mushy movie, the real deal. Maybe he was on it. who knows. He was eating dinner with Joe and Josh. They had nice dinner there.

"To what extent was late ninteenth-century and early twentieth-century United States expansionism a continuation of past United States expanisonism and to what extent was it a departure?" That was what I was working on before I was diverted to this Blog-thing. Simply riveting. If I was Joe I would probably inform you about every fact I know about US History, and then move on to what I have just covered in math class. But I'll spare you. Joe's such a swell student. Academic excellence embodied in a 15 year old boy. I also hear he's single. Think of all the dinner conversation, ladies. Biology, Calculus, Rhetoric, and More! Just Kidding...

Expansionism beckons to me like insect to a fly-killer. Poetry in motion. So long, folks. We're off to Boston tommorow afternoon.

-Swiff

NP: Mindhead - Fear

Shadows

2005-02-02T11:59:00.000-05:00

Yeah ... today's the day the rodent does his thing...

It's gotta be weird for the little guy. Think about it. You're all comfy-cozy, sleeping in your cave like a big-old, hairy bass player, when all of a sudden some guy yanks you out into the cold by the scruff of your neck. I dunno about you but I hates havin' my scruff grabbed. Poor Mr. Groundhog.

Then there's the whole shadow thing ... if he sees it or doesn't see it predicts the rest of the winter. Hmmmm ... Makes me wonder what my shadow says about me or what it predicts. I think we leave a lot more shadows around than we realize.

Got the oil changed in the PIF mobile today ... had the tires rotated ... replaced the burned out bulb in the tail light. It took a long time. But, now it's all set for the road trip to Boston this weekend.

Gotta paste labels on about 100 prerelease cd's that Dobbie burned for us. Dobbie is such a swell guy. Hopefully people will buy them all this weekend in Boston. That would be awesome and give us some cash to pay some bills.

We gotta schedule the studio time to get the rest of the CD done. I'll look at the calendar after I blog.

Sarah won't be able to come with us Friday because we have to stay in a hotel and that wouldn't look very good. So, she'll come down on Saturday and we shall all say "Huzzah!"

The ice cream poll was interesting. Let's see ... how 'bout a question of the day?

Would the groundhog have seen his shadow where you live today?

Peace out,
- PIFFY

NP - Robert Randolph "The Right Direction"

Rainy days and Mondays

2005-01-31T21:07:00.000-05:00

Know what bugs me? SPAM ... now I'm not talkin' the processed pink meat stuff in the can ... I'm talking e-mail that wants me to take a cruise, buy vitamins or get some great prices on drugs. We have to put the email address on the website ... that's the way it works ... and then automatic web spiders crawl in, snatch it and then send us SPAM, SPAM, SPAM. No sir, I don't like it.

I'm not sure where that came from ... it's a mad SPAM rant.

Our two fans visit the website an average of 6,000 times a month. Man, those two crazy moms are busy...

I want some ice cream. I'll get some after blogging.

What type of ice cream do you like?

Sunday morning went well. Bad cables made for a short sound check and we seemed to lose Swiff's guitar now and then but no one died or hurled or stood up and said, "Shutup! You guys suck!!" So, with like 400 people there, that's a good thing because you gotta figure there's gotta be one person in the crowd thinking "I could stand up and yell something..." It went okay and was a fun time.

There was a 78 year old guy preaching and talking about heaven being ecstacy and it was funny because he said, "Not like Ecstacy that you give a woman to ..." and then trailed off. Hmmm ... We'll admit that a number of us wondered "to what?" That was pretty strange.

We're getting ready for the big trip to Boston this weekend. They say there will be like 500 kids there so that will be fun. You should go. We've gotta be there to sound check at 5:00 Friday. That's kinda weird since we don't play until Saturday morning. So ... we just hangout in the Sheraton Friday night and listen to James.

Well ... this blog has come to an end ...

Leave a comment. Comments are cool and make us happy.

Practice makes perfect

2005-01-29T19:13:00.000-05:00

... sort of. I'm pretty sure James' 1,000 miles per hour drum fills were near perfect yesterday. Sure, James doesn't normally play drums, but he likes to spice it up every once in a while with his hard-metal-speed-core-football-rock stylings. Yes, we spent the majority of yesterday and today practicing new songs, rehearshing for Congress, and playing John Lennon's "Imagine". We spent the night at James house because we like to spice it up every once in a while and we wanted to give Piffy and Robyn a break and stop hanging around their house all the time. We watched "Cable Guy." I had never seen it before, it was pretty good.

Today I discovered a secretly hidden CD at James' house. You'll never guess what CD it was. Never. It was. the. Backstreet Boys. Live. Oh, the hilarity. James said something about getting it at McDonald's. I don't buy it for a second. Im pretty sure he's way into all those boy band guys. I know Wayne the Main Brain McLain is. Or maybe James just wanted to spice it up a little bit with some nice super processed pop. My favorite. I guess he just wants it that way. I didn't ask him why he had the CD. Why ain't nothing but a heartache.

Today we journeyed to Wendy's for a sort of mid-afternoon meal. Joe was a cool guy and bought me food. I was broke. Well, I still am. Donations can be sent to 43 Mill Rd. Kennebunkport, ME, 04054. Or you could always send a sandwich. No tomatoes. Joe doesn't eat onions on his burgers. What a wierdo.

I'm going to watch School of Rock. Stick to the man, folks. Don't let him get you down.

-Swiff

NP: David Crowder Band - Deliver Me/Coming Towards

The final Friday of January 2005

2005-01-28T21:59:00.000-05:00

Today is the last time it will ever be the final Friday of January 2005. Kinda sad when ya think about it. Okay, maybe not...

Added an MP3 type ringtone to the PIF download page today. That was groovy.

We put out the bimonthly e-newsletter to those 1289 PIF fans who subscribe to it. It was very informative. If you didn't get it you should join the pif mailing list. Then twice a month, you'll shout "Huzzah!" to discover a PIF goody in your email.

Practiced for a few hours tonight working on transitions mostly and some of the new songs. Tommorrow we'll practice for a few more hours and work on timing out the sets for next weekend's Boston gigs.

Slumber party at James' house tonight. Footie pajamas, doing each other's nails ... all that normal slumber party stuff. Josh has a meeting for Nicaragua in the morning ...